This female friend of mine, whom I've known for about a year, told me today she broke up with her boyfriend of 2 years. Admittedly, I developed a crush on her when I first met her...found out she had a boyfriend and since then have been seeing other women while remaining friends with her (we have the same social circle). That said, I still find this girl attractive, we still have good chemistry, and so I'd like to see if we can be more than friends. Any advice on how I should handle this? She's already been coming over to my house a lot lately, and probably will this weekend if she doesn't go out of town. Also, I don't know her ex-boyfriend, so he's not an issue.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Friend just broke up with her BF
- Thread starter jcb1772
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
devilkingx2
Master Don Juan
careful about dating a girl who's almost definitely not over her EX(unless she got tired of his crap and dumped him), make sure you're not too deep in the friendzone before you proceed. if you are then she'll bang some guy but it won't be you
I think I'd gone a bit beta and was seeking her attention/company too much this week. I got the sense she started to tune me out yesterday. So today (after reading some advice on old threads here), I have avoided starting up conversations with her...and then when she's messaged me, I've been acting distracted and uninterested (basically one liner replies). Lo behold...she keeps messaging me. Funny how that works. Not sure how long I'll keep doing that, I'll probably drop some flirt crumbs next week and see what happens.
Maximummax
Senior Don Juan
don't be her rebound guy
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
