Ringleader41
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2011
- Messages
- 326
- Reaction score
- 2
Do yall even deal with this or not
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Uh, so what?Ringleader41 said:They arent, but theyre already hooking up with another guy or other guys when I meet them.
Ya so its my dumb luck playing against mefloydb25 said:Very common. I think it also depends on who youre going after. Some girls are into relationships: others arent. Typically the hot / flashy / revealing ones arent. Theyre always jumping around, and seem to be hooked on another guy every week. Just the way it works. Youre probably going after the single-minded, always taken, in-demand, player-types. Their value is high because theyre always dating or hooked on someone, so everyone wants them all to themselves. Too bad it doesnt work, as they know their value, and exploit it fully. They are never not with, trying to get, or thinking about another guy. And another. And another. Even if they hook up with you - its usually not for long.
For these types, you definitely play the numbers, put no expectations in, dont take rejection personally (even if theyre rude, stuck up, have high standards, etc), dont take them seriously, and all of that stuff.
Youre going to run into this a lot if youre into the single gig yourself. Just gotta keep chugging along, and accept that its the nature of the game.
floydb25 said:Very common. I think it also depends on who youre going after. Some girls are into relationships: others arent. Typically the hot / flashy / revealing ones arent. Theyre always jumping around, and seem to be hooked on another guy every week. Just the way it works. Youre probably going after the single-minded, always taken, in-demand, player-types. Their value is high because theyre always dating or hooked on someone, so everyone wants them all to themselves. Too bad it doesnt work, as they know their value, and exploit it fully. They are never not with, trying to get, or thinking about another guy. And another. And another. Even if they hook up with you - its usually not for long.
For these types, you definitely play the numbers, put no expectations in, dont take rejection personally (even if theyre rude, stuck up, have high standards, etc), dont take them seriously, and all of that stuff.
Youre going to run into this a lot if youre into the single gig yourself. Just gotta keep chugging along, and accept that its the nature of the game.
The problem is I can get a ONS with them but when I try to get more I cant because of that one guy.Brighty said:Solid advice, and if this is that type of girl then I hope OP takes it to heart, but at the same time who's to say that she's that specific kind of girl?
What if she's just a normal single girl in college acting like a normal college kid is prone to do? It doesn't sound like she's going around whoring it up, it just sounds like she's with this one guy just to hook up. Contrary to what a lot of people might say otherwise on this board, there's nothing wrong with that.
All I really have to go off of here is that she's hooking up with another guy and that she's not dating anyone. She's not dating anyone. I'm going to assume you're in college or something, and hooking up with someone is completely different than dating. Stop telling yourself you have dumb luck, nothing's even happened yet. Go for it man, give it a shot. If you like this girl you owe it to yourself. What's holding you back?
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
I hit the post limit on my main account (how long has there been a limit to only 10 posts a day?), but I want to do my part to help out here before I leave for work. But you have to be more specific man, we can't help you if you're being so tight-lipped and vague about the details behind all this. Everyone's been through the **** at some point, we can all relate to this kind of stuff, we've all been there.Ringleader41 said:The problem is I can get a ONS with them but when I try to get more I cant because of that one guy.
Ringleader41 said:I dont really want a relationship. I want a f-buddy. Ill just use a recent example. Hooked up with girl twice, she seemed like she was a potential camdidate. Wrong because apparently theres like a guy or other giys above me. I see all my friends getting f-buddies and they dont act smooth at all and plus im better looking than them.
Ringleader41 said:Id take a relationship but if i go for relationship wont i fail. Its impossible for me to get one lol .
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.