Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Sooo I'll start by teasing her by text, but I honestly don't know what to say to her which is why I fail most of the times. I have a very serious face on all the time and I look innocent but I do sometimes get overly serious. How do I lighten up the mood to counter-act that?MainDroite said:You need to appeal to some other sense of hers before. Sort of like a key to her mind. Only then, when she trusts you're not just a ****er looking to get into her pants (which you are, but for the sake of seduction, let's try to hide that fact), will you be able to make her "playfully" chase you.
Shy people actually open up surprisingly easily through text. You might want to try that, too.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
She's doing the same degree as me, I know her from university.MainDroite said:Well, first off, where do you know her from?
That's a pretty boring attitude man, someone fun and playful wouldn't go about things like that would they? :rock:TheJazz said:Mate, if you like fun & playful and she's introverted, she's not for you. Move on.
Haha good to know there needs to be more people like us in the world.TheJazz said:That's just me. I'm tons of fun. I'm all about the tickling and playing and whatnot. However when someone's gloomy and brings the mood down, I walk away and find someone or something else that's fun. Must I let their crumby mood/mindset ruin mine? I think not. Lately I've been into WEEDING OUT people and things that have no value to me. It seems to be working wonders. Hoorah.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.