ERB
Don Juan
Crazy bitches out there guys.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Don’t leave your condoms at her place
- Thread starter ERB
- Start date
Crazy bitches out there guys.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
ERB
Don Juan
Probably fake. Posting so the younger guys who don’t think about this. Gave me chills after I come across this video.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
RickTheToad
Moderator
Never trust a redhead or a b!tch with a big butt and a smile.
DEEZEDBRAH
Master Don Juan
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backseatjuan
Banned
Actually this is a valid concern. The btch I'm meeting today, I told her to fck off a year ago on new years eve, she is 39, no kids, she wants kids, she has ugly face a 6 and hot body 8. Sht I'm thinking of flaking on her. That btch can totally do it. Her ability to have children is at question tho. Absolutely, flash condoms down the toilet.
what if it will clog the pipe? it doesnt dissolve
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
dating older women ha ha
marmel75
Master Don Juan
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Not my problem
dustmuffin
Master Don Juan
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- Jul 21, 2015
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As a landlord who has had to unplug pipes filled with condoms don't do it. Take them with you.
marmel75
Master Don Juan
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- Jan 4, 2012
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Haha...not my concern
Not a professional plumber here, but think if condoms can clog a wide drain pipe there’s something seriously wrong with the plumbing or it’s something simple like a bad toilet wax ring, but something is wrong beyond flushed condoms…
The only time I had a bad pull the toilet drain clog was when my 4 year old daughter flushed a bikini she didn’t like.…
Lmao years later
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
RickTheToad
Moderator
Simple. Put a bag over her head, and do her from behind. You can then get a second condom, leave it behind, and fill it with horseradish sauce. So, if she does that, she'll get a rude awaking. I read it someone on the forums once. I thought it was hilarious.