BackInTheGame78
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Easier said than done when involved with a woman you care about.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Did I freak my secretary out?
- Thread starter TheGambino
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"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
TheGambino
Master Don Juan
Free meal... ye that’s why she offered to pay for the food last time. She insisted on paying half and did... couldn’t talk her into me paying.
Yet again I know ofc that fvcking her or attempting is anyway a bad idea. Maybe only a good idea if I think about going “exclusive”.
I’ll give it time, go professional and see what she does... end of it.
Jesus man..exclusive?
You are entering banned posters Big Dave and Big goals levels of hard headedness.
Glassguy
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I like inviting a chick for a drink to a restaurant, dive bar, pizza pub, etc if I dont know her in real life. Say someone that I started messaging on FB with lots of mutual friends. Its a good place to have some convo and see if we vibe. In this situation a woman of any value isnt just going to come over to your place for drinks for a plethora of reasons.
HOWEVER.........
If it is someone that I know very well in real life, as OP knows this chick, I would NEVER go to a restaurant. It would only be my place for drinks. Major reason why- disinterested women would say "well I dont know you well enough to come straight to your place". This chick OP is referring to cannot use that. She either comes over or she doesnt. Its cut and dry.
I like to determine interest level very early on. Many guys dont like doing this because it will be early rejection if the chick isnt into you. Thats fine, I would rather not waste any time on someone who's interest is lower than agreeing to meet for drinks.
In my past employment I was a consultant for a huge company based in NYC. I smashed a few chicks during that time before I went on my own in the business ownership world. At no point did I ever take them out for drinks. It was my place only........having said that, I will say that I would never entertain the thought of trying to screw a coworker because there are too many risks involved in today's world, and too many chicks that are attractive and have value outside of work places.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
All women aren't a scorpion. You must identify her core personality first. Thusly i don't agree ALL are the same, even though some women may meekly and weakly go along with a group think even if they don't agree on most of it.
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"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Without makeup?
BackInTheGame78
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This is becoming very sad to see...
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
If she don't care about you, you better figure it out...
Igetit!
Moderator
Going exclusive....? What da hell???
Dude..........You're making Big Dave start to look sane now.
You need help,man. Like,SERIOUSLY.
dude just stop most vets, sopme I don't see posting for a long time is telling you, you are going incredible wrong here, take a deep breath, distance yourself, and stop thinking with your emotions, that is not even your **** talking since the last ego boosting topic you cursed everyone for calling on your sh!t, said you can do better, then please prove it, not for, we don't care, we offer help when asked, do it for yourself, and please help us to help you
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
TheGambino
Master Don Juan
Okay, this sounds all shocking and stupid for many veteran members here. Yes, I understand the risk, yes it ain't a good idea, I know all this.
Ofcourse she knows I like her and yes I also know she had/has some interest.
But the damage is not done yet. I never showed weakness, never acted jealous, never asked about her ex. Never reacted emotional, always a masculine frame. No whining, or b1tching, always very dominant, nice and with energy focussed on work around her. Always professional, only making jokes sometimes and some cexual jokes last week like I said. No big damage. I didn't ask her out 1 on 1, I didn't give her advice on her bf who cheated on her, I didn't show any weak signals or made it clear with words that I like her. We only flirted, vibed, and that's it. Like I said, she is the one who asked me every single day what I was up too that night and if I was cooking for myself. Just to fish what I was planning and if theres a girl. We had drinks once after work but when she got a few drinks in her system and started to tell about her ex that came back in her life I ended the evening and left. She knows I'm kind of interested but I also told her I date chicks, she knows I spin plates, she knows a girl is interested is trying to lock me down and im uncertain of that.
You guys know how I really feel about her, but she doesn't that's the main thing now. She feels that I am uncertain of her wheter I want to fvck her, I also show her mixed signals. She is probably hella confused also. She does not know how I feel, I remained hard masculine with no emotions around her, ever, period. That's the main thing, so I can easily eject and go back to 100% professional without any damage.
I will follow up, she is probably coming back to work saturday if she feels good with no complaints. She called that her other friend that was also on the ''party'' tested today and if he has corona she will test too. Whatever, if she comes to work or not.
I decease. I go professional, I leave it like it is and focus on everything but her. I do my best, I did not do any big damage. I only went renting on here, clueless if I should go for the kill and ask her out to my crib or be smart and try to leave it.
Ofcourse she knows I like her and yes I also know she had/has some interest.
But the damage is not done yet. I never showed weakness, never acted jealous, never asked about her ex. Never reacted emotional, always a masculine frame. No whining, or b1tching, always very dominant, nice and with energy focussed on work around her. Always professional, only making jokes sometimes and some cexual jokes last week like I said. No big damage. I didn't ask her out 1 on 1, I didn't give her advice on her bf who cheated on her, I didn't show any weak signals or made it clear with words that I like her. We only flirted, vibed, and that's it. Like I said, she is the one who asked me every single day what I was up too that night and if I was cooking for myself. Just to fish what I was planning and if theres a girl. We had drinks once after work but when she got a few drinks in her system and started to tell about her ex that came back in her life I ended the evening and left. She knows I'm kind of interested but I also told her I date chicks, she knows I spin plates, she knows a girl is interested is trying to lock me down and im uncertain of that.
You guys know how I really feel about her, but she doesn't that's the main thing now. She feels that I am uncertain of her wheter I want to fvck her, I also show her mixed signals. She is probably hella confused also. She does not know how I feel, I remained hard masculine with no emotions around her, ever, period. That's the main thing, so I can easily eject and go back to 100% professional without any damage.
I will follow up, she is probably coming back to work saturday if she feels good with no complaints. She called that her other friend that was also on the ''party'' tested today and if he has corona she will test too. Whatever, if she comes to work or not.
I decease. I go professional, I leave it like it is and focus on everything but her. I do my best, I did not do any big damage. I only went renting on here, clueless if I should go for the kill and ask her out to my crib or be smart and try to leave it.
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Yes, 96 posts accurately summarized there…
Men of decision take action without waffling…
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