"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Clubbing advice needed

O

OneNine

New Member
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Hey,

I've decided after a long while spent avoiding clubs and dancing to get back out there again, but I've developed massive (stupid I know) anxieties over it. So, even though this is a little newbie 101, any words of encouragement or advice for what to do if I go into paranoid mode and try and leave or even for how to enjoy myself? The point of tomorrow night for me is to try and get comfortable at that kind of environment again, seeing as how that's the main place for sarging at university. I'm going to be with a friend and people I know, so there's a plus in terms of support.

Thanks,
OneNine.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Z

ZenGodMod

Senior Don Juan
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I've stopped clubs, always end up with the most questionable women.

Easiest dam thing to do, find a friend who loves clubbing and go with him just for warm ups.

Just be there for starters. The rest will come back.
 
S

Sir I

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rofl :D I'm a bartender at a club. there is nothing easier than a club even if you have anxieties. it's all about not caring just having fun enjoying yourself DO NOT TALK TO MUCH. and basicly go for it. but as ZenGodMod said, it's a weird thing but you do most of the time end up with a questionable girl.

do not stress the deal enjoy yourself make contact do not even think about her reaction and at the least get a good laugh out of it.
 
D

DonGorgon

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Studying the fact that all lies contain fragments
Sir I said:
rofl :D I'm a bartender at a club. there is nothing easier than a club even if you have anxieties. it's all about not caring just having fun enjoying yourself DO NOT TALK TO MUCH. and basicly go for it. but as ZenGodMod said, it's a weird thing but you do most of the time end up with a questionable girl.

do not stress the deal enjoy yourself make contact do not even think about her reaction and at the least get a good laugh out of it.
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Great advice..
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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