You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
I've gone too far, but it wasn't because of being creepy. It was more because she didn't have a sense of humor. Don't attempt to come back from it. Her lack of a sense of humor really isn't your problem.Trace said:Has anyone ever tried to push buttons with a girl to build sexual tension but ended up accidentally going a little too far with it.
How do you come back from it?
So how do you know you went too far? How did she respond?Trace said:I was invited to go see a country band with back stage passes. I took pictures and sent a couple to her from there and with the various artists that were back there.
I knew one of the bar tenders, so she gave me the hook up. So I was kinda intoxicated and rubbed it in just a little too think.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I used to do this when being ****y funny. If you do it too much then you're just an ass. What you've got to do is get experience figuring out where the line it. If you cross it, realize you've got to rebuild a lot of comfort. Neil Strauss once talked about this and had a routine for it. He'd say he didn't mean to offender her, that he and his sister would bust on each other as a way of showing their affection and it was just his way of showing he liked her. It's pretty crafty in that it rebuilds comfort, shows vulnerability, and reframes everything in a positive light. It also creates what would have been a frak up into a giant form of push-pull in terms of lots of negative emotions swinging up to lots of positive emotions. That large scale emotional juggling is what the hottest women tend to crave.Trace said:Has anyone ever tried to push buttons with a girl to build sexual tension but ended up accidentally going a little too far with it.
How do you come back from it?
Thanks for this Nutz. This actually happened to me last week. I was busting on a girl pretty non stop and it turned into silent treatment from her. Was pondering what the best way to work back from that was. You answered it, thanks.Nutz said:I used to do this when being ****y funny. If you do it too much then you're just an ass. What you've got to do is get experience figuring out where the line it. If you cross it, realize you've got to rebuild a lot of comfort. Neil Strauss once talked about this and had a routine for it. He'd say he didn't mean to offender her, that he and his sister would bust on each other as a way of showing their affection and it was just his way of showing he liked her. It's pretty crafty in that it rebuilds comfort, shows vulnerability, and reframes everything in a positive light. It also creates what would have been a frak up into a giant form of push-pull in terms of lots of negative emotions swinging up to lots of positive emotions. That large scale emotional juggling is what the hottest women tend to crave.