becoming exclusive! please read!!!!!

[hot stuff]

how do you get a girl to settle down to become exclusive!! im seeing a girl for a while now but were still not exclusive!! any tips on that? please help

 

[penkitten]

would you like to be my girlfriend?

 

[blinkwatt]

Why must you label it as "exclusive"? Just go with it,don't give it a name.

 

[Shiftkey]

Wait for her to bring it up. If she never brings it up, don't worry about a label defining your relationship.

Ideally (assuming you want a GF) you should be dating multiple women until the one you want asks you to stop.

 

[hot stuff]

would you like to be my girlfriend?

lol yeah ok only if ure hot and horny and up for some dirty sweaty sex 5 nites of the week! :cheer:

but anyways...ive been seeing this girl for about 3 weeks now properly, which i suppose isnt very long and im starting to develop this oneitis for her now! i no i no what a pile of pull ****e!!but im doing my best to control it!! its ****ing hard though!! i might try and make her jealous and game her a little more by playin more HB's..that should escalate her feeligs for me!

 

[hot stuff]

sounds goood!! cheers i know most of this stuff anyway like but just would like a little encouragement!!

However, we have been seeing a lot of each other recently and she said we should slow down a little becasue we are both going to university in a few weeks for our first year!! does that mean i should next her..even though im pretty sure shes very attracted to me

 

[Rebound Material]

BINGO

Don't listen to Penkitten, thats a sure fire way for friendzone.

Shiftkey has it right on the money. WAIT for her to ask you, then and then only can you be sure that she 100% Interested in you. Patience..

Sarge On...

oh man...makes me wish that i can somehow go back in time and just fcukin kick myself in the fcukin balls for doing what Penkitten posted...

YES, thats a one way ticket to 0% attraction.

 

[Tomatoes]

You can wait but i would test the water.

To to her about something you were talking about with someone else about her.


"Yeah i just said i was with my girlfriend." See how she takes it. If its good then its a nice indicator in the right direction. If she takes it bad. Just say in a C+F fashion. "Oh you thought i ment you?"

I did that in my last relationship and we just started calling each other bf and gf.

Sarge On!

 

[mpimpin]

This questions been asked before. I'm gonna give the usual answer ...... If she hasn't brought it up, Why should you?

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

oh man...makes me wish that i can somehow go back in time and just fcukin kick myself in the fcukin balls for doing what Penkitten posted...

YES, thats a one way ticket to 0% attraction.

Sorry Penkitten, you are nice and all, but being a girl means you have really no idea how to build attraction towards women. You have no experience in that regard.

*DISCLAIMER* --> The following ONLY applies to girls that you have known for a while and are "friends" with or are somewhat casually dating.

I can tell everyone here straight out from my own EXPERIENCE (not based on "theory") that coming out to a girl and saying that you like her or want her to be your girlfriend kills attraction. Almost completely. In some cases it can send her running for the hills depending on her personality. Save that crap for sappy love stories in the theatre...because that is the only place it really seems to ever work :crackup:

I can also say from witnessing other people's experience that the same observation above holds true. Even when it does work out with the girl, it does not seem to last long at all. Some girls have trouble saying "no" and feel obligated for some reason to try to reciprocate your feelings.....and they won't be able to do that for long if the attraction is missing.

The reverse situation where SHE asks you is the ideal scenario. Girls who ask you first are usually very attracted to you for whatever reason (again from my experience). Her asking you builds a solid foundation for a relationship if you want one as long as you play your cards right. However, you should always maintain an active and aggressive position in the relationship and not let her take the lead all the time.

 

[penkitten]

actually if the chick really has high interest in you, and you are together alot, she will feel a "need" to define the relationship and ask you something along the lines of "so what are we now, boyfriend and girlfriend or what"?
you could answer then.

or you could ask her now. im a chick and i have been asked "would you like to be my girlfriend" alot. its not like the rest of these guys on here never asked a girl that. come on, they did.

i like the one guy's reply to you about waiting until someone asks you something and say "well i was with my girlfriend or this is my girlfriend." sometimes its easier just to imply it and dont make a big deal about it.

ps. alot of times , certain guys on this site, pick on me because i am a chick. it doesnt neccessarily mean the advise is bad.

 

[Phyzzle]

certain guys on this site, pick on me because i am a chick. it doesnt neccessarily mean the advise is bad.

Penkitten, how did you and Gio end up being exclusive?

Did Gio say "would you like to be my girlfriend"?

Of course not. Duh. That's why your advice sucks sometimes, because you don't relate it to the real world, and what men have REALLY done that you REALLY got attracted to.

 

[penkitten]

Penkitten, how did you and Gio end up being exclusive?

we seemed to be exclusive from the start. of course neither of us actually said that in the very beginning. however, we did lots of talking before we met because the traveling distance was huge. we both worked and i have children so there really wasnt alot of time for us to be talking to other people at the same time. we just started taking turns visiting each other before we couldnt stand to be apart. we always knew we were a good match .

the guy who posted this thread isnt in the same position that we were in.

i do not see anything wrong with either person asking about how their relationship stands and i really do believe that usually if a gal is interested enough, she will define it for you

 

[Cod3r]

Why must you label it as "exclusive"? Just go with it,don't give it a name.

Well hmmm....

If there is no label that's open field for messing around to happen. If you've been seeing a girl for about a month or 2 and the relationship is defined in its actions, but no label... ur girl is fvcking around or you are...

You can't cheat if you're not bf and gf, when no label both parties can do whatever the fvck they wanna do with no consequences. Until she's your gf, she can date other guys... go party every wknd wit her girls ect... now most of you will say... "fine go head, donn care" but if it was a girl you truly had feelings for you wouldn't want her doing that crap... label that shvt bro... but if u got interest she'll do it for you...

--
My current gf did it in a casual way... "sooo when do two people become bf and gf ?? In Japan its different, i want to understand american way" blahh blahhh, this threw hints she wanted it.... then i juss told her she was my gf one night on the train.... that was that, didn't kill any attraction


-Cod3r

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

actually if the chick really has high interest in you, and you are together alot, she will feel a "need" to define the relationship and ask you something along the lines of "so what are we now, boyfriend and girlfriend or what"?

I've seen that happen when a couple has yet to step into the role of "official couple." You've seen it. She regularly leaves stuff at your place, she asks if you have an extra toothbrush, she leaves with a handful of your boxer briefs because she looks good in boy shorts. Hey, this sh1t happens!!!

 

[Badmannaz]

just say "i don't want you seeing anymore guys" she'll know what that means...a girl tried to do that to me...it worked

 

[Scorched]

yeah...

Go with what they said... It keeps the ball in your court...

I ****ed up yesterday... 6th date with this girl and I told her I don't plan on dating anyone else... Basically I thought I was going to get in her pants once she figured we were exclusive (Then she's all mine...) Then later that night I was like do you like your new boyfriend? I shouldn't have said ****... I DIDN'T GET ANY... Maybe she was just on her period... Lesson learned though...

 

[Bronxtal112]

Wait for her to bring it up. If she never brings it up, don't worry about a label defining your relationship.

Ideally (assuming you want a GF) you should be dating multiple women until the one you want asks you to stop.

Best advice on here. It may be tempting to ask for her to stop dating other people. Don't do it.

 

[Centaurion]

lol how old are you? 12?

This brings up memories from 4th grade.

I have never asked a girl if she wanted to be exclusive. It is something that gradually happens over time.