"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Ambiguity
- Thread starter wildchild
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
alphamale1
Don Juan
Something like this (shortened):
'You know when you are having a great kiss, and you get THAT feeling, at times like that its hard not to focus in on WHERE that feeling flows next'
Its effective because you are allowing the woman to fill in her own details, rather than substituting in your own understanding. It also gives an implied message that you are someone who understands how to make her feel this way. An AFC would say the sentance this way:
'You know when you are having a great kiss, and you get that feeling of butterflys in your stomach, when you feel that way, you may also notice a heat flush'
The statement may be true, but its not as effective.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
spidersense
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2005
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- 156
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- 45
The same could not be said for some of the other 'gurus' such as DeAngelo whose C+F takes months to get right, and actually cost me a number of nice oppertunities.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Does the fact I said it takes months to get right, not imply that I spent months getting it right? Because I did.
Does the fact that I said it cost me a couple of oppertunities not imply that I made **** ups at the start? Because I did.
Just to clearup the issue, Deangelo was my starting point on this whole scene, I respect his 'inner-game' stuff - this was very useful. I also respect his structured approach.
The thread was about ambiguity, which we agreed Ross was very good at. I also think the NLP works great depending on your starting point, mine was from a DD background.
Check your facts before you shoot in future, there is no harm in learning from as many sources as possible so long as you actually go out and put the knowledge into practice.
abcd_z
Senior Don Juan
http://www.fastseduction.com
Posters like Gunwitch, Formhandle, ijjjjji, Mystery, and TylerDurden all spring to mind. Each one has their own unique style that incorporates techniques learned from others, and each one has a sh*tload more tools to learn from than just "neg-hits, C+F, and RJ-style". There's that stuff too, but...well, just check it out.