Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
You could always do these tasks on your own. Maybe create a journal on here.crossedup said:really wish I jumped on this when it began. Approach anxiety is the main thing holding me back. I'm gonna join in, but I won't post here
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
That only happens when you've got super model looks.ngdonjuan said:Approaching women with confidence comes across as desperate. You may get a conversation, a number or a kiss but you'll ultimately hear let's be friends best case, worst case she runs away.
Guys that have value don't approach. The key is to put yourself someplace with a lot of women and ignore them, look important and they'll come to you. That seems to be the only thing I see work for master DJ in real life.
While this is mostly true, it's not that we CAN'T approach. It's just that the girls do all the work for us, so why bother. Also, why go out of your way when most girls are so annoying; girls are not priority #1 or even #2 at any given time...more like 8.ngdonjuan said:Guys that have value don't approach.
Get the hell out of my thread.ngdonjuan said:Approaching women with confidence comes across as desperate. You may get a conversation, a number or a kiss but you'll ultimately hear let's be friends best case, worst case she runs away.
Guys that have value don't approach. The key is to put yourself someplace with a lot of women and ignore them, look important and they'll come to you. That seems to be the only thing I see work for master DJ in real life.
Darth said:While this is mostly true, it's not that we CAN'T approach. It's just that the girls do all the work for us, so why bother. Also, why go out of your way when most girls are so annoying; girls are not priority #1 or even #2 at any given time...more like 8.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.