Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
That's an often mentioned point. But if one can't trust her on such an important topic, then how can one trust her on anything of value and consequently how can one LTR/marry her, considering that trust is the bedrock of a relationship?
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
That’s the point of my comment...
It basically falls under the category of "don't ask questions you don't really want the answers to".That's an often mentioned point. But if one can't trust her on such an important topic, then how can one trust her on anything of value and consequently how can one LTR/marry her, considering that trust is the bedrock of a relationship?
Real world experience makes me realize stuff, not thinking of imaginary people and scenarios. Besides the binaries are too extreme to matter. 50 guys vs 3 is not a head scratcher.
I'd contend this and double down: if you don't think of these things you're just setting yourself up for failure. These things matter, a lot. Relationship vetting is one of the most important things that most men ignore.
That's the point of a hypothetical...the purpose is to get you to know what sort of expectations you have from women you date, whats ideal, whats a dealbreaker, and what sort of questions about their past you realistically want to ask them. The example was just to illustrate a point, obviously the fewer sexual partners is better, period.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Honestly, I wish women could be at a lower bodycount. But the problem is most women aren’t below 10. Most are probably between 10-20. But the problem is that even when women have long term relationships most of their life w very little periods of time being single, those periods of time where she was single was an emotionally-fuelled ****fest and hoe phase where women can easily rack up 2-3 guys per month for 2-3 months on end, before getting into their next relationship. Women who are serial monogamists are almost worse than women who are single for longer periods of time because of those breakups and her wanting to “make up for missing out”. The odds of getting a chick less than 10 is like finding the crystal skull, however, at this point may be something you need to accept if you want to get laid and have relationships at all. They’re ALL higher than you’d want.
I suspect the average # of notches is around 15-25 actually. It almost seems like <10 is expecting too much. Even a girl as young as 20 could easily have 10+ bodies...most attractive women start having sex as young as 14. Just think about that. Even if it's only 2-3 per year, by the time they're in college they could easily be double digits. Then in college they could easily do 5 each year or 20 in one year, depending on the severity of their hoe phase.
honestly I hold the same stance when it comes to marriage, however, if I’m going to emotionally invest over time into a woman, not only would notch count and “her past” matter (specifically being alpha widowed in her past), but there are many methods of determining (relatively) what her notch count happens to be. However the point on marriage does stand, it’s absolutely bad and I don’t know why anybody would do it in 2024
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
It’s a good idea not to, as asking a girl her notch count would only imply that you just don’t “get it”. The alphas women are used to ****ing don’t ask these questions, they just enjoy the sex and the woman and onto the next. It’s considered “bad form” to ask, however it’s innate in our nature as men to care. Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answer to, you can still find out by getting to know her and her past, but be discreet and stick to the basics of game. From her perspective, come across as: Chad doesn’t care about notch count, so seem like you don’t care about hers, and enjoy ****ing. Asking her notch count is a loss of frame.
To be sure, it’s not a loss of frame if she likes you. You can pretty much do anything if she really likes you. I have called women hood rats, thrown them out, have them get wasted and show their friends who all flipped out and then the same evening had that angry elf jump in my car in front of them and within short order blowing me. That said, should you? But make no mistake when you are in the frame it’s yours to lose.
