"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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52...have baby with partner?

nzrod

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Hi gentlemen
I have just turned 52 and my 45.5 year old Asian girlfriend wants to have a baby. We live together. She had two miscarriages when she was married 8 years ago...and is childless. She was devastated and still wants a kid (marriage ended as he cheated).

I feel if I dont, the relationship might not last. She may a) subconsciously resent me for all time or b) subconsciously seek a man who will, while being with me. I dont think she will consciously do a or b as she is very Christian with clear morals but she is also a human ...so subconsciously she may.

If I have a kid I will be about 71 when the child is 18.

What are your thoughts please?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
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Hi gentlemen
I have just turned 52 and my 45.5 year old Asian girlfriend wants to have a baby. We live together. She had two miscarriages when she was married 8 years ago...and is childless. She was devastated and still wants a kid (marriage ended as he cheated).

I feel if I dont, the relationship might not last. She may a) subconsciously resent me for all time or b) subconsciously seek a man who will, while being with me. I dont think she will consciously do a or b as she is very Christian with clear morals but she is also a human ...so subconsciously she may.

If I have a kid I will be about 71 when the child is 18.

What are your thoughts please?
Let her go. Everyone else here will say the same thing.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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lost_blackbird

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Yeah, she's probably got like half a dozen eggs left at that age. I often
see this on Bumble, rough looking, post wall women 45+ who have selected
'haven't decided yet' on the children category. I think Mother Nature may have
made that decision for you my dear, in more ways than one.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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Definitely do Amniocentesis and discuss it before knocking her up, if she’s not preggo in a month get ready shell out 10k plus for invitro.


I'm in my late 30's now, and I still want to have kids. My concern is that your girlfriend is 45.
 

Plinco

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Definitely do Amniocentesis and discuss it before knocking her up, if she’s not preggo in a month get ready shell out 10k plus for invitro.
Are you talking about me or OP?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Plinco

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Whoever is thinking about knocking up a woman that’s 35+
I think I'm still pretty potent. On my father's side of my family I have cousins in their late 40's knocking up women.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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Amniocentesis is about making sure that the developing fetus does not have any genetic disorders and being able to terminate the pregnancy if you choose to or prepare for the arrival of a special needs child.

This is a REQUIREMENT for 35+ maternal age, as the reality is that the incidence of problems like this goes through the roof at that point.

I think I'm still pretty potent. On my father's side of my family I have cousins in their late 40's knocking up women.
 

Plinco

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Amniocentesis is about making sure that the developing fetus does not have any genetic disorders and being able to terminate the pregnancy if you choose to or prepare for the arrival of a special needs child.

This is a REQUIREMENT for 35+ maternal age.
Oh I don't touch women over the age of 27 with a nine foot pole.
 

lost_blackbird

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When you see stuff like this you just have to laugh... :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: 47 and trying for a baby with
this green card seeker. Fool me once and all that....

 

SargeMaximus

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While I’m not against having kids at any age, never have kids just to save a relationship. Because if and when that relationship ends, the poor kid will get some of your resentment. It’s fvcked up
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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The Duke

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She is too old. Already had two miscarriages, if she gets pregnant this will likely end in devastation as well or the kid will be retarded. It's high risk.

If all you are is a baby maker for her, then I guess you can find out for sure.

I had one that wanted marriage from me. I knew it was to secure resources. I told her to hit the road. No big deal. You can always get more women.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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