"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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What is "Alpha" Anyway?

raider87

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I'm a simple guy.
Alpha = cool guy
Beta = uncool guy
The terms annoy me now.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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TheProspect

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But I always reframe it to "you're just a random person on the internet, your approval doesn't matter that much".

And l obviously I barely acknowledge them because my frame is already needless for approval.
This is the go-to deflection of yours to avoid addressing any of your fallacies, to avoid civil discourse, and to avoid taking responsibility for your behaviour.

You "barely acknowledge" others on this forum, choosing to personally attack them, because you are more interested in being right (validating yourself) than you are a logical discussion. You assert your frame is constant on the above I've quoted immediately after suggesting you reframe once you face opposition.

The principle is if you had a life, you shouldn't have the energy to write 10000 words about a random stranger on the internet.
Your combined responses in discussions (and arguments) on other threads with members on this forum is a direct contradiction of this.

People who don't know these principles end up looking like low value betas with too much time
Projection. And ultimately a violation of the very "principles" you preach.

Anyone who comes out of their lanes to convince others how great they are ...... are coming from an inferiority complex.
Projection. This is behavior you display often and shamelessly on this forum.

The few guys on this forum that are self focused are the alpha ones. They don't gossip, start petty drama, stick their noses into other people's business, etc. That's all overcompensating behavior.
Projection of your own behavior, which apparently some members have screenshots of PMs on here.

---

I already know what you're thinking,

You don't know me, so you don't care what I say.

I am talking about you, so I am proving you're the dominant alpha and get a lot of women.

No need to respond or reframe, I've already added to your self-proclaimed status as a "sosuave legend". ;)
 

Red Legg

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Alpha=much ado about nothing,and if I did seek a definition it certainly would not be from a woman.
 

marmel75

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Just picture the dude from the Dos Equis "Most interesting man in the world" commercials...

Or Denzel Washington's characters in his movies. Almost all of them are alpha dudes.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

RangerMIke

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Alpha is just the top 10%, the 9s and 10s. What the OP describes is just the characteristics males have that happen to have the highest SMV. Having high SMV is something you HAVE... not your behavior. All a man can do is be the very best MAN he can be, and be dedicated to self improvement. Do the best you can with what you have (lose weight, work out, wear clothes that complement you, be stylish), be productive (make money, hone your skills), do stuff that involves people (get hobbies that require you to do stuff with a wide variety of people), thy new things.

When you become what most people want, naturally your characteristics will mirror what you are. Your behavior will match your characteristics. You can not pretend to be something you are not, women see right through this facade. Behavior follows reality.
 

bigneil

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One thing I've noticed about all the big shots I've met in my life is that they've never had to tell anyone "I'm alpha". If you have to tell someone this, then it's pretty obvious you're not what you claim.
In person, everyone instinctively knows who is the alpha male in the room.

Note: when a man is a generation older, he can't directly compete with another man - he would be pathetic for trying. He's supposed to be a role model at that point.

There is really no such thing as online alpha.
 

SteR

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It's also relative / situational. I could be in a room with 10 people and for argument's sake I could be considered the "alpha" in the room. 2 minutes later Trump walks in and it all shifts. It's not like once you're considered an "alpha" it'll carry over to every situation.
 

3agle 3yes

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Maximus in the Gladiator film is someone I think of as an "alpha male".

But like some others here I don't like the term "alpha male".

Alpha of course is the first letter of the Greek alphabet and generally means "first".

Yet, always trying to put yourself "first" is a childish way of thinking.

I think Einstein had it right when he said:

"Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value."
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Von

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Maximus in the Gladiator film is someone I think of as an "alpha male".

But like some others here I don't like the term "alpha male".

Alpha of course is the first letter of the Greek alphabet and generally means "first".

Yet, always trying to put yourself "first" is a childish way of thinking.

I think Einstein had it right when he said:

"Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value."
Alpha = First = Selfish

I like the Thread.

Alpha is contextual

However, it keeps one basic concet: "First"

First=Best

Alpha = Selfish

First Selfish best outcome independant

It takes work, I am on the trail.

Your inner game should dominate your outside game
 

bigneil

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He's in an industrial supply type business and is a former pro-athlete.
Translation: he an underemployed illegal immigrant who played Soccer in Honduas for one year, and BeExcellent normally picks up the tab.

If he played a real sport, she'd say "He played baseball/football/basketball/hockey". But no. He's "a former pro-athlete".
 

BeExcellent

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Translation: he an underemployed illegal immigrant who played Soccer in Honduas for one year, and BeExcellent normally picks up the tab.

If he played a real sport, she'd say "He played baseball/football/basketball/hockey". But no. He's "a former pro-athlete".
Hockey.
 

zekko

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Alpha=much ado about nothing,and if I did seek a definition it certainly would not be from a woman.
On the other hand, I've read about as many men's definition of "alpha male" as there are posters on this forum. They're less than a dime a dozen. I thought it would be interesting to hear a woman's definition for a change.

I'm aware there are some guys on here who wouldn't believe that 2+2=4 if it came from the mouth of a female. I think its best to base the merit of what people say on their actual words, rather than their gender.
 

BeExcellent

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Funny, I thought she was describing me. Amazing how we can carve a specific image at a young age and later become it.

Growing up, I watched Godfather a lot, and picked much of his strength, style, fairness, and charima. Outside of the "family business," Don Corleone is great working example of alpha.
Nobody laugh. I've never seen that movie. Might have to watch it this week. :):rolleyes:
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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darksprezzatura

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Just picture the dude from the Dos Equis "Most interesting man in the world" commercials...

Or Denzel Washington's characters in his movies. Almost all of them are alpha dudes.
Training day is a good example
 
A

AJ84

Guest
Maximus in the Gladiator film is someone I think of as an "alpha male".

But like some others here I don't like the term "alpha male".

Alpha of course is the first letter of the Greek alphabet and generally means "first".

Yet, always trying to put yourself "first" is a childish way of thinking.

I think Einstein had it right when he said:

"Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value."
So true. Think about women you dated or men you know who feel entitled to put themselves first and hence place their needs and wants above everyone else's. How likeable are those people, really?
There's nothing wrong of course with putting yourself first in some situations but there has to be some give and take, otherwise you're the as*hole or bit*ch that no one wants to be around.
 

ChristopherColumbus

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The 'alpha male' is the leader of a pack of wild animals that a David Attenborough talks of in reverent and hushed tones.

It is a good metaphor, especially given the wildness of the times, but it is just that, a metaphor and limited - neither comprehensively nor irrelevantly describing a magnanimous man's position. For we are not animals, but human... all too human.
 
A

AJ84

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On the other hand, I've read about as many men's definition of "alpha male" as there are posters on this forum. They're less than a dime a dozen. I thought it would be interesting to hear a woman's definition for a change.

I'm aware there are some guys on here who wouldn't believe that 2+2=4 if it came from the mouth of a female. I think its best to base the merit of what people say on their actual words, rather than their gender.
I used to post on a dating forum which was mainly women. Kind of similar to this site but with a female focus.
Some men would reply to a post about dating advice and there were several female posters who would get defensive and occasionally insulting to men who posted, but I noticed that if a woman posted something similar to what that man posted, it was treated as gospel, accepted, or at the very least politely considered. Yep, some things aren't that different.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

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