Dhoulmagus
Banned
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Has it?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Has going ghost/nc ever worked for you?
- Thread starter Dhoulmagus
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
dustmuffin
Master Don Juan
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Yes....it has kept me sane after a breakup. I didn't do it to get her back. I did it for me to keep my sanity.
CuddleJunkie
Master Don Juan
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Yes, made the difference between getting my mental healh and independence back again, and keep on being a little needy ****.
I have never understood the advice "No Contact." If she tells you to go to hell, why would you even think of calling her back? If she sleeps with another guy, why would you even think of calling her back? Isn't it common sense?
When we have to act in a certain way because of a girl/to win a girl/to win a girl back/to impress a girl, we have already LOST the game.
No contact isn't a form of passive aggressiveness to get a girl to rethink things by punishing her with a lack of your presence.
Its you pulling the draw strings saying:
You know what, I'm putting in more than I'm getting. I'm worth more and I'm going to forget this person and spend the time I was allocating to them on somebody/something more worthy.
Its you pulling the draw strings saying:
You know what, I'm putting in more than I'm getting. I'm worth more and I'm going to forget this person and spend the time I was allocating to them on somebody/something more worthy.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
CuddleJunkie
Master Don Juan
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preferably on yourself. There's a saying in Spain "una mancha con otra se quita", it means something like "a stain gets out with another stain", and that's not a saying I want to live by. Stains are stains, you look better without them.
Maximus Rex
Banned
Yes.
Dhoulmagus
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Well the girl didn't commit either of those things, so I don't have any motive to cease all contact. I pulled a mongol approach, by giving her a little more attention than usual yesterday, and I will ghost her from here on out. If I don't hear from her then oh well lol because I'm talking to another girl now lol.
EyeBRollin
Master Don Juan
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It always "works" because it is about you, not her.
If someone slams the door in your face, you walk in the other direction. You don't keep trying. No contact is obvious.
If someone slams the door in your face, you walk in the other direction. You don't keep trying. No contact is obvious.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Dust 2 Dust
Master Don Juan
I went no contact on my ex-girlfriend after she moved out of my house. She began calling me non-stop a few days later and begged me to take her back. I think she was shocked by my nonchalant attitude towards the whole thing and the fact that I didn't chase her after the breakup. No Contact isn't meant to win someone over. It's meant to help you cut ties with someone in which you have an unhealthy attachment to.
SeymourCake
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The purpose of NC is not to get back with the person, but to allow yourself to get over that person. NC is not some sort of technique to play mind-games with the girl. It's for you to move on to better things in life.
Not necessarily. I do it to maintain balance and emotional independence. It breaks any mental patterns & conceptions & expectations she may try to hold against you later.
Blatant disrespect is one thing. Losing frame is another--that's on me and I'll take whatever time I need to fulfill myself before reentering that interaction from a better place.
But to answer the OP, yes. I have a 100% success rate on girls I've ghosted for 2 or more months. It's an effective reset and those girls are among the most compliant and respectful and least demanding I have on deck (regardless of the flavor of the initial interaction)--they know I can walk away and only come back because I want to.
I spent a bit too much time shacked up with nursie before she buggered off to China. 2 weeks NC so far. I'll leave the ball in her court. In the meantime I have an Aussie girl lined up tonight oh well some days you have to eat hamburger. And a Vietnamese girl lined up for next week. I really like Nursie but SS has taught me nothing good comes of sacrificing frame.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Floydispink01
Senior Don Juan
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Girl I dated a couple of months back randomly texted me out of the blue yesterday telling me she's sorry and wants to see me again after ignoring my advances back then.
Didn't chase her once. Just went about my life.
Maybe No Contact screams out loud to them. Who knows. Who cares. I might set up a meet with her again, I may not. It's a nice attitude to have.
Didn't chase her once. Just went about my life.
Maybe No Contact screams out loud to them. Who knows. Who cares. I might set up a meet with her again, I may not. It's a nice attitude to have.
GS750
Master Don Juan
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This is the best answer
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
No contact is cinching up the trash bag and tossing it in the dump. It's not a technique it's what you do when you are finished with a woman.
Do some women come back after I've moved on? Sure, but it's not that many. Most women that reach back out to me I ignore
Do some women come back after I've moved on? Sure, but it's not that many. Most women that reach back out to me I ignore
Uncharted
Master Don Juan
Yes worked great for me. About 6 months ago I deleted her number and all social media. Havent heard from the girl since and could not care less. She was a cancer that was wrecking my life.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.