"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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You know you haven't had sex for a while when....

Veridin

Senior Don Juan
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...You wake up the day after and your chest muscles ache from holding yourself up in the missionary position. :)

Also shows that you need to start doing pushups again.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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badboyjmm

Senior Don Juan
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when you have frequent wet-dreams
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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confident afc

Don Juan
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when u find yourself turning your head to stare at every piece of ass that walks by
 

Strelok

Master Don Juan
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Mar 20, 2010
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...when you restart behaving like an afc even if you know this site in the hope of getting laid or even worse when you believe to the feminist bullsh*t and act accordingly even when there are no women.
 

mikeyb

Senior Don Juan
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May 10, 2007
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UK
you suffer from tennis elbow but you don't play tennis.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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scorpio1138

Don Juan
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Mar 31, 2010
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you get a terrible case of blue balls out of nowhere -had this happen when I didn't choke my chicken for 2 weeks.
 

Naughty Ninja

Banned
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Apr 9, 2010
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You scored a 'piece of a$$' last night but it was only because your finger broke through the toilet paper.
 

blackwolf

Don Juan
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Jun 10, 2010
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i went 7 years without sex until this year jan. it didn't feel like a first time or nothing... i just sucked a bit... but after a few more fuks i was perfect again. now im back to having no sex... probably another 7 years wait.

*looks @ hand*
 
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