"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Read more...

You know you are an AFC when......

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Bonez

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 11, 2007
Messages
304
Reaction score
4
When you have sex with a ho and say "I probably don't need a condom"

(is that afc?)
 

mpimpin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Messages
1,746
Reaction score
14
Location
Bama
Bonez said:
When you have sex with a ho and say "I probably don't need a condom"

(is that afc?)

no thats just being stupid
 

Sinistar

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 15, 2005
Messages
550
Reaction score
31
When she tells a guy she has an STD (before hand) and he does her anyway.

When she tells a guy she has an STD (afterwards) and he "supports" her.

He calls the doctor for her (regarding the STD).

He pays her traffic tickets for her.

He asks her about a intimate experience with another guy.

She answers and he listens thinking its getting him somewhere.

She gets mad/angry/brutal and he tells himself its his fault.

She is suspected of banging the entire team and he tells himself she is different.

She banged the entire team and when confronted he believes she will be different.

She swallows for the bad boys but he's okay when she doesn't do it for him.

He writes poems - lots of poems.

He tells her he loves her before they've even kissed.

She goes to Cancun with a guy *friend* while he agrees to take her garbage out back home.

She asks him to feed her friggin' poodle because she's gonna stay at a *friends* house.

(...this is way too fun...)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,546
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
She banged the entire team and when confronted he believes she will be different.
that actually happened to me in high school. and what was even worse.. I WAS ON THE DAMN TEAM AND I DIDN'T GET ANY!
 

Docs

Banned
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
3,571
Reaction score
56
Location
Kingston, Can-a-duh
You know you're an AFC when....
- Even her ugliest friends tell you how much of a nice guy you are.
- Even the ugliest of the ugliest friends tell you how much of a nice guy you are
- You're 30, and your friends can't put their finger on why you can't get laid.
- You draft up a plan, with all variables accounted for except for one thing. You never follow though
- Or you follow though, and you forgot to account for the fact she doesn't like you.
- You get confronted by a random on the street asking you if you are dating this smoking babe walking beside you, and you tell them that no, you're just her friend.


And the all time greatest you know you're an AFC when...

... you admit it to yourself.
 
Joined
Nov 8, 2005
Messages
867
Reaction score
2
Location
***** palace
When you wake up on the floor because the fat piggie you just poked took up the whole bed.

When you drive your car for 3 hours just so you can see the chick for 1 hour.
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,546
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
PeterNorthisawesome said:
When you wake up on the floor because the fat piggie you just poked took up the whole bed.

When you drive your car for 3 hours just so you can see the chick for 1 hour... AND DIDN'T GET LAID

fixed it for ya
 

Bonhomme

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2002
Messages
3,956
Reaction score
16
Location
Land of the Ruins
You think this gal you just met is "the one."

You authorize her to use your bank account or credit card. :eek:
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Jariel

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 17, 2004
Messages
4,413
Reaction score
297
Location
UK
She tells you what women like, and you try to do everything on her list.
She tells you what she likes in a man, and you try to change into that man.
Your girlfriend flirts with your friends.
You flinch when a girl touches you.
You tell her how you feel instead of showing her.


Maan, this whole thread is bringing back some painful memories!
 

Jariel

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 17, 2004
Messages
4,413
Reaction score
297
Location
UK
Vulpine said:
When a woman asks "Does this make me look fat?" and you don't answer yes.
:crackup:

I pass this one. I often follow up with "But it's personality that counts". I think my GF has learned not to fish for compliments from me.
 

lildevil

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2006
Messages
218
Reaction score
1
Location
from here
"This one"

When your masturbatin and it strikes midnight on new years day.....so u make it ur resolution... to stop touching urself until u get a date
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,546
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
better yet, when you are spending new years eve at home waiting on your oneitis to call you while she is getting drunk and probably gangbanged down in New Orleans
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

lildevil

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 8, 2006
Messages
218
Reaction score
1
Location
from here
This one sucks!!

when your walking down the hall of your school...and the girl that youve passionately fall in love with ....is being kissed very passionately by some other dude ...and want to beat the living sh!t out of the guy for kissing ur girl or just burst in to tears:cry: ...
 
Joined
Nov 8, 2005
Messages
867
Reaction score
2
Location
***** palace
backbreaker said:
fixed it for ya
Wait wait... AFCs GET LAID? Since when? I heard plenty of AFC telling me how they drove 3-4 hours just so they can see the girl for 1 hour... not for sex but to TALK AKA LISTENING TO HER PROBLEMS... sucks to be an emtional tampon lol
 

Mr.Positive

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 13, 2007
Messages
1,855
Reaction score
99
When you text message a chick.

Furthermore, when you text message your oneitis more than you see her, she moves away...and then dumps you via text message. :crackup:

God I'm glad I found this site.
 

rakishness

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 16, 2006
Messages
484
Reaction score
4
Loving this thread!!! Keep it going.

.....When you ask a girl out through a friend
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Top