"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Woman lowering her value.

Punkisdead83

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So I've been texting this girl for a day or so and she constantly devalues herself. She refers to herself as boring, lame, not with it, etc. My instinct tells me she's trying to scare me off, yet she keeps sending me messages. What should be my next move?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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VladPatton

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I agree with Uncharted, but for the record, there is no reason a woman would degrade herself to keep you, just to push you away. However, these are all just words, so if she says yes to a date, then throw all that büllṣhit out the window.

Actions, not words, always.
 

Punkisdead83

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Asked her to meet up Friday. She's working and her dad is supposed to be visiting out of town. Keep the plate spinning and work on the next one?
 

VladPatton

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She had no counter offer? That's strike one. Ask again in the middle of next week to meet you for a drink/coffee (do NOT invest money into a date just yet). If she büllṣhits her way out of it again (without a counter offer) then that's all folks, and you walk away.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Punkisdead83

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VladPatton said:
She had no counter offer? That's strike one. Ask again in the middle of next week to meet you for a drink/coffee (do NOT invest money into a date just yet). If she büllṣhits her way out of it again (without a counter offer) then that's all folks, and you walk away.
Fair enough, will do. Still trying to get the hang of this stuff, thanks.!
 

lamobatsman

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VladPatton said:
She had no counter offer? That's strike one. Ask again in the middle of next week to meet you for a drink/coffee (do NOT invest money into a date just yet). If she büllṣhits her way out of it again (without a counter offer) then that's all folks, and you walk away.

what do you mean do not invest money into a date just yet?
 

Zerro

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VladPatton said:
She had no counter offer? That's strike one.
Yeah, lack of a counteroffer is a red flag. A counteroffer is fine as long as she sticks to it and doesn't keep pushing it further into the future.
 

Down Low

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Man lowering his value.

Punkisdead83 said:
So I've been texting this girl for a day or so...
If you can text, you have her number and can call. You text because you're so afraid of rejection that you can't even talk. She smells this on you and she's attributing your bad qualities to herself because she's a woman and can't handle direct confrontation. Replace the "I'm" with "you're" and it becomes painfully obvious that punk is not dead -- you're the punk and you're punking out.

Next time, keep it all face-to-face convos. When you do call, make it strictly business: limit the call to the when/where of your next meeting. No texts, no Fakebook, no gossip through third parties -- no punking.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

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