Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Why is OLD the last couple years borderline unusable??

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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BergischerLöwe

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Aren't you already seeing a mental health professional? Ask them.
I haven't brought up that specific issue much but yeah. Even if I get more confidence in trying it still does nothing for the issue that I'm never in any situations where I'm naturally meeting women tho
 

SW15

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I haven't brought up that specific issue much but yeah. Even if I get more confidence in trying it still does nothing for the issue that I'm never in any situations where I'm naturally meeting women tho
You need to bring the issue up with your mental health professional. You will also need to go out into the real world more and naturally meet women. You're not alone in the problem I described in the last sentence. It takes a lot of real world time to meet women. I have had 2 hour daygame sessions on a popular walking path in my city where I have had 0-1 approaches because there were few women who seemed receptive to an approach.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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BergischerLöwe

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You need to bring the issue up with your mental health professional. You will also need to go out into the real world more and naturally meet women. You're not alone in the problem I described in the last sentence. It takes a lot of real world time to meet women. I have had 2 hour daygame sessions on a popular walking path in my city where I have had 0-1 approaches because there were few women who seemed receptive to an approach.
It's gonna take me a while to find things I can even do since daygame isn't much of an option for me
 

I_have_BDE

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BergischerLöwe

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BergischerLöwe

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I have a friend that gets good looking women all the time on Hinge. Are you guys exaggerating how bad the sites are nowadays?
For what it's worth Hinge is better than tinder or bumble, even if it's given me diminishing returns over the years
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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I_have_BDE

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WOW JUST WOW. I decided to create a fake online dating profile just so I can see what kinda ladies were on the site and OMG. You guys were right. I still cant believe what I saw on there. Id say 90% of the women were either overweight or they had multiple kids. I thought you guys were exaggerating about this. Im in shock that it is this bad. 10 years ago it was great. It doesnt make sense why this is like this now. I dont understand what has caused this
Been trying to say that too. Before Covid OLD sucked but it was still useable. Even throwing up a couple crappy pics you could still get some results. The women were also much better looking back then and more of them. I mean still mostly crap but much easier to get replies and dates and numbers. 90 percent seems right. 10 percent of the women under 50 on OLD are cute. Other 90 full of tats, fat, or just ugly or all three. yet they're becoming more pay to play. I can't believe anyone would pay for the crap on there now. FB dating was okay back in 2020 and 2021 and it is free! Not it's POF and Tinder style garbage too. Even Match which had the hottest women before covid is dead now.
 

BillyPilgrim

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They've gotten phucked out and are revenge-seeking and trolling.

WOW JUST WOW. I decided to create a fake online dating profile just so I can see what kinda ladies were on the site and OMG. You guys were right. I still cant believe what I saw on there. Id say 90% of the women were either overweight or they had multiple kids. I thought you guys were exaggerating about this. Im in shock that it is this bad. 10 years ago it was great. It doesnt make sense why this is like this now. I dont understand what has caused this
It can illuminating to create a fake profile of the opposite sex.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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Can I just say my experience once again does not relate to what most posters are describing.

I am meeting hot women constantly from OLD with little effort and it actually is getting easier over the years. Ya'll are doing something wrong.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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It would always be useful to know what dating market people are in when they make claims about quality. Country and city would be very useful.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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What sites are using and are you using the same lines and same game to get them? Can you give us some tips?
I've only used Hinge for a long time now

I don't use the same lines at all I send tailored responses based on their profile or what they opened me with. 99% of my interactions start from likes/comments on my profile. I am convinced guys just have dogshvt photos. Need to be good quality photos with variety. Selfies or NPC pics like hunting/fishing are a big no-no.

It would always be useful to know what dating market people are in when they make claims about quality. Country and city would be very useful.
I would but don't want to disclose that. Medium-small city in US that I happen to think has a surprisingly high amount of hot women per capita - I've heard a couple of guys who travel a lot say the same thing.
 
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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

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