Who Pays

[Maximus Rex]

If you bounce with a group? Who pays? Are you suppose to pay for the whole group or only the target?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Give a reason for paying for either.

 

[Maximus Rex]

That's the point. I'm trying to find the anser to the question.

 

[Rata Blanca]

You don't.

 

[iqqi]

Did you invite her?

 

[Mr. Wolf]

My approach to who pays:


Do I feel pressured to pay? Like for some reason I feel uncomfortable and in my head I think I should pay.. If yes, then I don't pay.... If not, and I can justify paying without the BS like above then I will pay..

Unless I'm short and would rather not spend money.. But you know how it goes, sometimes money isn't as important as people you're with.. So it's a tough issue when I'm short.. I might even feel guilty afterwords because I paid and I'm short..

 

[ready123]

unless you're broke, it doesn't ****in matter

only way it'll ruin your game is if you obsess about it

 

[Reyaj]

unless you're broke, it doesn't ****in matter

only way it'll ruin your game is if you obsess about it

Couldnt have said it better myself. Girls hate cheap guys by the way.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Couldnt have said it better myself. Girls hate cheap guys by the way.

Don't you mean "cheap" girls hate cheap guys? And what about the rest of the group, would you pay for them too? Where does it stop? Is your ability to pay a woman's way the only thing that you have to offer?

Here's reality, there's always going to be some guy within the area who will be able to buy more than you. If you chose to pursue women who base your merit on what you can buy, you have little chance of keeping her interested as long as there are guys available who can buy more.

 

[Nexus Polaris]

^ Good call.

 

[comic_relief]

If it is with a group, I pay my part and everyone else pays their parts.

If it is on a first date period, I look at the check, look at her, and then will pay it if she doesn't offer to chip in.

If it is within a regular relationship, we go dutch (never had a girl that would complain about it).

comic_relief

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I want to see the ratio between the amount of times these guys pay for initial meeting and the amount of times that a relationship is sustained. Basically I want to see whether or not a guy can get more play (not to be confused with mere attention) if he buys his way to it. Personally, I believe I do better without needing to pay. Before anyone jumps off the hook, I'm just talking about someone you have just met and have not established anything with, not someone you have some sort of established relationship.

 

[iqqi]

I want to see the ratio between the amount of times these guys pay for initial meeting and the amount of times that a relationship is sustained. Basically I want to see whether or not a guy can get more play (not to be confused with mere attention) if he buys his way to it.

You still have the mindset that you are buying something when you pay. This is more of a turn off then being cheap in the first place.

When you pay, you are being a gentleman, and fulfilling a man's role. B!tch all you want about what a man's role is, cuz it is what it is.

Women entice, men pursue. It is the natural order.

 

[iqqi]

This thread is a duplicate...

Here you go.

This was discussed pretty in depth last month. Check it out.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

You still have the mindset that you are buying something when you pay. This is more of a turn off then being cheap in the first place.

When you pay, you are being a gentleman, and fulfilling a man's role. B!tch all you want about what a man's role is, cuz it is what it is.

Women entice, men pursue. It is the natural order.

Only to people like you who live in romantisized, idealistic, Harlequin-like dream worlds. The type of people who believe that "...If he loves me, he'd know what he had done wrong..." The ones who believe that a gentleman is defined by how many hoops he'll jump through or how many times he can be wrapped around a finger. Basically, people who don't have enough trust that a guy's attention alone proves his interest in her, his wallet does and if he doesn't comply, he's somehow less than a man even though he could offer more than what you could ever deserve.

I should start a thread about how women should put out for a guy on a first date if he pays for dinner. It's not as if they are in a relationship or anything so the sex wouldn't count toward anying substantial (as if the were married) so she's not giving it up. A real woman would want to know if a guy is sexually compatable with her especially since he went out of his way not to buy something since he technically didn't buy her dinner.

 

[penkitten]

Here you go.

This was discussed pretty in depth last month. Check it out.

yeppers...

 

[iqqi]

Only to people like you who live in romantisized, idealistic, Harlequin-like dream worlds. The type of people who believe that "...If he loves me, he'd know what he had done wrong..." The ones who believe that a gentleman is defined by how many hoops he'll jump through or how many times he can be wrapped around a finger. Basically, people who don't have enough trust that a guy's attention alone proves his interest in her, his wallet does and if he doesn't comply, he's somehow less than a man even though he could offer more than what you could ever deserve.

Pretty good post, there, buddy. A little extreme.

I'm just telling you how it is. If you are pursuing a woman, and she accepts a date with you, but you do not pay, there is a very great chance that she will think less of you. Like that you are cheap for one. It might not be a big thought, but it is always the little thoughts in the back of the mind that ruin everything.

Most women I know and including myself will not stop seeing a guy because he doesn't pay. Also, we assume we will be paying for ourselves when we go out with a guy, because you never know where his mind is at. And if he has other things going for him, it isn't a deal breaker or anything.

But nothing compares to a man who can just take charge, and sometimes that includes paying a woman's way when he has just invited her to something that she is going to because he asked her.

It is hard for me to explain to a guy who doesn't get it, or doesn't want to get it. It is your choice, obviously.

From your first post I quoted you on, it is obvious that you see it as buying something, instead of money merely providing opportunity for something.

 

[Lord Shinra]

I chose not to be cheap on $2.89 for our 2 coffees.

I dunno, I figured breaking my $100 was more important that being like, "Seperate" and then expecting her to fork over $1.15.

 

[Effington]

If you are concerned with spending money, I would recommend watching "Half Baked". Dave Chappelle's character has a great date with very little cash, and gets the girl. Totally real, too. Really.