Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Who pays for the date?

Josh Davidson

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Should the man pay for the date, or should both people pay their own way? Would paying for the date make me seem like a nice guy? I am only in it for the potential sex, in case that makes a difference.
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Georgepithyou

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Always split the bill, or you can pay for lunch and she pays for drinks or something. I don't believe a man should pay for everything unless his seeing an escort.

Women who demand men pay, are prostitutes in my eyes.
 

Josh Davidson

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Always split the bill, or you can pay for lunch and she pays for drinks or something. I don't believe a man should pay for everything unless his seeing an escort.

Women who demand men pay, are prostitutes in my eyes.
Ok. Thank you!
 

EyeBRollin

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Should the man pay for the date, or should both people pay their own way? Would paying for the date make me seem like a nice guy? I am only in it for the potential sex, in case that makes a difference.
The inviter pays. That is almost always the man especially in the beginning of courtship. Women who offer to split the bill are blowing smoke up your ass so they don’t owe you anything. Do NOT split the bill ever.
 
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Josh Davidson

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The inviter pays. That is almost always the man especially in the beginning of courtship. Women who offer to split the bill are blowing smoke up your ass so they don’t owe you anything. Do NOT split the bill ever.
Ok. I won't. Thanks for the advice!
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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manfrombelow

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In the beginning of the courtship aka the very first 1-2 dates, the inviter pays. It's as simple as that.

You offered her the date, so you pay. And if the woman you're dating insists on splitting the bill on the 1st date, that's 100% bad omen. She's not sexually interested in you so she doesn't want to feel like she "owes" you anything because she's already knew there won't be a second date.
 

Georgepithyou

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The inviter pays. That is almost always the man especially in the beginning of courtship. Women who offer to split the bill are blowing smoke up your ass so they don’t owe you anything. Do NOT split the bill ever.
Your both going on the date, so why does the inviter need to pay? You shouldn't make urself so submissive
 

TheCharmingGuy

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Don’t split the bill unless the date went horribly and she wants to split it, in that case let her split it. But if the date went well then you should pay it all because you know there will be future dates in which you can split. But always pay on the first date unless it sucks.
 

Velasco

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Walk up to cashier with her, order what you want ("and that's it") and pay for your own sht. THEN ask her if she wants something or nah as your paying with your card. So she cant hit you with that, "yeah get me a...", as if YOU'RE the cashier lol.

if she does, then step aside and let her get and pay for what she wants. Fellas,,, she was gonna pay for lunch/dinner anyway. Not like because she came out on a date with you, she is therefore spending unnecessary money just cuz you the one who initiated the date.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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TheCharmingGuy

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Good strat. Takes the pressure off the decision and you seem more of a gentleman without making it about gender roles.
 

EyeBRollin

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if she does, then step aside and let her get and pay for what she wants. Fellas,,, she was gonna pay for lunch/dinner anyway. Not like because she came out on a date with you, she is therefore spending unnecessary money just cuz you the one who initiated the date.
No, this is being cheap. It is neither classy nor attractive. If you extend the invitation, you pay the whole bill. That’s a gentlemanly habit every man should adopt. Only let her pay if she offers to do something else after the date like get ice cream. Otherwise, it is proper to decline her wanting to pay for the date that you planned. Tell her she has to do the inviting if she wants to pay.
 

manfrombelow

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No, this is being cheap. It is neither classy nor attractive. If you extend the invitation, you pay the whole bill. That’s a gentlemanly habit every man should adopt. Only let her pay if she offers to do something else after the date like get ice cream. Otherwise, it is proper to decline her wanting to pay for the date that you planned. Tell her she has to do the inviting if she wants to pay.
Exactly, if she offers to buy you movie tickets or ice cream after the date, then you're free to let her. But before that? Come on man, having a spine and having a frame doesn't mean being cheap.
 

PRW63

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a) I wouldn't do expensive first dates
b) pay for the first date
Same here. Actually the first few dates. There is no splitting the bill until there is a real relationship and we are now doing more expensive things. I pay because I am inviting them on what I am taking them on, it symbolizes leadership, who is in control, and I am the one in control of what the date is and how much it costs. I'm ok if they just want to handle the "tip".

The women who fight to split the bill, don't get a second date. They are either:
  1. a feminist
  2. want to be in control, it feels like you are in a battle for control when they do that
  3. don't trust me, so no point in seeing them again anyway
  4. probably a few more things I could add here if I wanted to think it through more
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Steel_Neurons

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a) I wouldn't do expensive first dates
b) pay for the first date
Yup. Personally, don't do movies, meals, etc for first dates. I'd just go for a coffee/drink and pay for it all. I'd be looking for more than just sex, though, so maybe it's not a great strategy for that?
 
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