"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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when to follow-up date, make another?

phoneproblems

Don Juan
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How long after a first date do you wait to call or email if you liked her and she said she had a good time? Do you setup a second date right then or make her wait?

I am thinking to just email a note tonight that I had a good time Sat. so she doesn't write me off -- but not setup another date now. We are both busy and I have a couple other dates lined up. Something like:

"Hey, Sat. was great, esp. enjoyed bla bla bla. I am super busy the next couple weeks but will definitely be back in touch. Good luck with ..."

Also, am I right that I should not add any questions in there requiring response? Since we have moved from online to real world I don't want to slide back into a virtual thing. You guys agree?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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phoneproblems

Don Juan
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okay, here's what I got back:

"I had a very nice time too. I would definitely be up for hanging out sometime. ... maybe [date] we could get together?"

Note the word "nice" (which I didn't use myself) as well as "hanging out" and "sometime" (didn't use those terms either).

Seems like low interest, right? I just got turned into one of her girlfriends?
 

tmpgstx

Master Don Juan
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Sounds positive to me. The word *maybe* though is the kicker here.

Because you told her you were busy, then she threw that out there for you and with a specific date which is good.

She knows you're not asking her out as a friend, so this looks good.
 

Heretolearn

Master Don Juan
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looks fine for the get to know you stage.

a) she replied quickly
b) she wanted to meet up again.


No time to get oneitis though :)
 
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