When a girl says she think an "acquaintance is hot"

[CyrusTheGreat]

When a girl you're dating says that she thinks a mutual acquaintance (eg goes to the same college as you two) is hot, what does it mean?

1) Doesn't mean anything.
2) It's a shyt test.
3) It's a sign of low IL.
4) Something else (please elaborate).

I'm keen to know you opinion in different scenarios. For example 2 weeks into dating, 2 months into dating, and more.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

You didn’t mention if she was heterosexual and if the acquaintance was male or female.

“It is impossible to reason with insufficient data.”

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

You didn’t mention if she was heterosexual and if the acquaintance was male or female.

“It is impossible to reason with insufficient data.”

Indeed, I should have included these. Everyone in the equation is heterosecsual, and the acquaintance is male. Also, let's say she has said it in an excited tone and more than once.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Did she mention it to you one on one or did you overhear her talking to someone?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

It means if you slip up she is going to be trying to fvck him with not much provocation.

 

[Macadellic]

It means she doesn’t respect you.

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

Did she mention it to you one on one or did you overhear her talking to someone?

One on one.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

One on one.

It also means while she is fvcking you, when she closes her eyes she is seeing him in her mind fvcking her.

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

It also means while she is fvcking you, when she closes her eyes she is seeing him in her mind fvcking her.

LoL. Even when she looks in my eyes during secs and says loves me?

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Well it’s a **** test. I’ve been a weightlifter forever now so I carry a lot of lean mass - I’d probably say “dude needs to work on his lats (or whatever)” or “friends don’t let friends skip leg day”.

When you have a good physique this is always a way to cut on other guys even ones with decent physiques. “I should write a split for him, he looks like a fire hydrant.”

Or just say nothing at all. She’s shyte testing you.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I think practically speaking, it may not be immediately but your relationship is on borrowed time, so get as many kinks out as you can with her before the train leaves the station.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

LoL. Even when she looks in my eyes during secs and says loves me?

Well she can't have her eyes closed while looking at you, can she? Those seem mutually exclusive.

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

Well it’s a **** test. I’ve been a weightlifter forever now so I carry a lot of lean mass - I’d probably say “dude needs to work on his lats (or whatever)” or “friends don’t let friends skip leg day”.

When you have a good physique this is always a way to cut on other guys even ones with decent physiques. “I should write a split for him, he looks like a fire hydrant.”

Or just say nothing at all. She’s shyte testing you.

I'm leaning more towards a shyt test as well, but one that is disrespectful, shows low IL, and puts the longevity of the relationship at risk.

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

Well she can't have her eyes closed while looking at you, can she? Those seem mutually exclusive.

She doesn't close her eyes pretty much for the whole duration... But I get your point.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Your young man, just chalk it up to experience. I know that doesn’t make it any better right now.

 

[Gamisch]

It's a mixture of 1, 2 and 3 perhaps . It means as much as you give it importance.

-how long yall dating now?
-I see the word college. That means she is on the younger side? How old is she?
- I also wonder how and why she brings this up. You both are Netflix and chilling and than boom, "Jimmy is kinda hot ", out of nowhere?
- I also wonder if she just knows him or does she actually is in contact with him?
-Basically I wonder: do YOU feel like you should be worried?

It is what it is though. You'd be naive to believe she'll stay with you for ever ever. She might be wandering around and maybe you gave off so much friendly vibes by now she (unconsciously) puts you in some sort of friendzone / "more like a brother" position where she feels comfortable enough to tell you something like this. it's on you to (subtly and unconsciously if needed) regain or improve frame and show her you are her best option for now..if the damage isn't already done.

Generally I would say dont worry, but it does seems kinda disrespectful. There are plenty of hot people ,no need to mention that and fck with your head. Still I would take a even DEEPER look and analyze how you behave around her and how she reacts to you.

You gotta be honest and look back how it all went down; how you met her, who initiated the relationship, her past . Only then you will be able to come up with a sincere answer to your question.

I'll end with a (in)famous Chris Rock qoute;
You were NEVER her first choice

 

[Gamisch]

Well it’s a **** test. I’ve been a weightlifter forever now so I carry a lot of lean mass - I’d probably say “dude needs to work on his lats (or whatever)” or “friends don’t let friends skip leg day”.

When you have a good physique this is always a way to cut on other guys even ones with decent physiques. “I should write a split for him, he looks like a fire hydrant.”

Or just say nothing at all. She’s shyte testing you.

Always good to be ARAP( as ripped as possible). Also good to simply downgrade your adversary (" who him, I thought you had a better taste ").

But you know women. They agree with a bunch of them together who's hot and then start fantasizing about those men. Difficult to stop influences from her female friends.

If he's not responsible for her bringing this up then I also agree with your last sentence . Maybe even tell her to shut the F up or counter by telling her Stephanie is also hot?

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Truth is if you’re top 5% fitness (think Michealangelos David, not spandex road bike noodle boy) you can play something like this off 99% of the time. It’s the same as the boyfriend destroyer lines of yore.

Always good to be ARAP( as ripped as possible). Also good to simply downgrade your adversary (" who him, I thought you had a better taste ").

But you know women. They agree with a bunch of them together who's hot and then start fantasizing about those men. Difficult to stop influences from her female friends.

If he's not responsible for her bringing this up then I also agree with your last sentence . Maybe even tell her to shut the F up or counter by telling her Stephanie is also hot?

 

[AureliusMaximus]

It means she doesn’t respect you.

Or attempting to make him jealous or both for the sake of the attention.

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

@Pierce.Manhammer @Gamisch
Very insightful responses.

- Dating a month
- She is 23
- I initiated, she did the pursuing
- We are both in contact with him infrequently IRL. But I know she isn't talking to him on phone or text. But saw her once checking his socials. My gut doesn't feel like anything is gonna happen here. But I'm curious about the future in general.

I am not really seeing the guy as a threat. I am more trying o evaluate the girl and the relationship here. So my goal asking this question isn't about disqualifying the competition or raising her IL. Basically I wanna know what Anti Dump's Machine would do here!?