mahon83050
Banned
There is some chick I am pursueing at work. When we e-mail each other she occassionally says.....talk to you later buddy or alright man. Is this ******** for LJBF.?
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Hahahaha rumour time!Originally posted by bonjove
Yeah, I really blew a situation like this once. There was this girl who heard about this girl, and what she did and was trying to get me to ask her out. Well, I asked her why she cared, and she's like "I'm your friend," and then I got all sarcastic and said "Yeah, that's what all the girls say! All the time they just want to be friends with me." The she is like, you are so loud, people in the dorm will hear about this, quiet down. So I say really loud "Hey, everyone in the dorm, it's rumor time, tell your friends." Then she's like "I'm leaving now," and so she left. I talked with her the day after and said I was just being sarcastic, and wasn't serious, and that sometimes I think she treats me like crap, so she goes "If a girl does stuff like that she probably likes you." So, I'm like "Whatever."
Don't ever act like that it's not kosher.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
i havent asked her out cause i simmply dont have the time for it with school, work, gym.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Good suggestion!Originally posted by BrWnSugaMan
On the last class day don't ask her out in class but instead wait until later on that night. Then call her up and say something like, "I really enjoyed having class with you this semester and I would like to see you again sometime. How about we do XXX on Friday/Saturaday night?"
ok thanks for the advice, but arent fridays and weekends reserved for my friends?Originally posted by BrWnSugaMan
ScrewIt,
Asking her out in front of her friends is not a good idea. Here is one possible option:
On the last class day don't ask her out in class but instead wait until later on that night. Then call her up and say something like, "I really enjoyed having class with you this semester and I would like to see you again sometime. How about we do x on Friday/Saturaday night?"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.