mahon83050
Banned
There is some chick I am pursueing at work. When we e-mail each other she occassionally says.....talk to you later buddy or alright man. Is this ******** for LJBF.?
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Hahahaha rumour time!Originally posted by bonjove
Yeah, I really blew a situation like this once. There was this girl who heard about this girl, and what she did and was trying to get me to ask her out. Well, I asked her why she cared, and she's like "I'm your friend," and then I got all sarcastic and said "Yeah, that's what all the girls say! All the time they just want to be friends with me." The she is like, you are so loud, people in the dorm will hear about this, quiet down. So I say really loud "Hey, everyone in the dorm, it's rumor time, tell your friends." Then she's like "I'm leaving now," and so she left. I talked with her the day after and said I was just being sarcastic, and wasn't serious, and that sometimes I think she treats me like crap, so she goes "If a girl does stuff like that she probably likes you." So, I'm like "Whatever."
Don't ever act like that it's not kosher.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
i havent asked her out cause i simmply dont have the time for it with school, work, gym.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Good suggestion!Originally posted by BrWnSugaMan
On the last class day don't ask her out in class but instead wait until later on that night. Then call her up and say something like, "I really enjoyed having class with you this semester and I would like to see you again sometime. How about we do XXX on Friday/Saturaday night?"
ok thanks for the advice, but arent fridays and weekends reserved for my friends?Originally posted by BrWnSugaMan
ScrewIt,
Asking her out in front of her friends is not a good idea. Here is one possible option:
On the last class day don't ask her out in class but instead wait until later on that night. Then call her up and say something like, "I really enjoyed having class with you this semester and I would like to see you again sometime. How about we do x on Friday/Saturaday night?"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.