Da Realist
Master Don Juan
The question is, drak, have you done or have you not? Like I said: been there, done that. Instead of attacking the "rules", test them.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
what's the problem with taking your girl to a club?
- Thread starter drak_ool
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
I don't understand when a dude brings his girlfriend to the club! Let kels tell you. LOL.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qF4U3in9llA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qF4U3in9llA
Most girls know where they stand on the hotness totem pole. Taking her to a club is unlikely to alter her perception of herself. If a girl is a HB9, she knows damn well that she is an HB9. Going to a club wouldn't exactly be a revelation for her.zekko said:
Besides, most girls in their 20s have probably been to a club at some point. They're expecting to get hit on by a lot of guys. In fact, they'd probably be pretty disappointed if they weren't.
I personally wouldn't take a girl out on a date to the club for simple logistical reasons. Usually clubs are so damn loud that you can barely even hear yourself think, let alone have a meaningful conversation with someone!
I'd much rather take a girl out to a bar. At least there, you can hear each other clearly. You don't have to constantly wade through a sea of people either! You can sit down and get to know each other. Plus you can also play darts, pool etc. At a club, you can grind on each other and that's about it.
That's what this whole thread is about. I'm attacking the rules by testing them. I have taken plenty of dates to bars, as I mentionned in the past, at one point it used to be part of my standard routine. I also take my gf now to clubs when I feel like hitting them up. I have never seen her flirt with a guy that is try to hit on her. Not when I go to the bathroom, not when I (or she) go(es) to the bar, or in any other situation. If I got any other reaction from her, I would start re-assessing our relationship.Da Realist said:
Since you say your opinion is based on your own actual negative experiences with chicks/gfs you took out to clubs, I respect it. Clubs are not for everybody. I'm not saying you HAVE TO take girls there, I am simply saying you can make it work if that scene is your thing even if you bring your date/gf.
We're all tyring to escape the matrix, so let's not start erecting our own walls and hide behind them is all I'm saying. Let go of your limiting beliefs and the possibilities are endless.
Da Realist
Master Don Juan
Truthfully, it wasn't so negative since I found out at the time she down for me. On top of that, it was funny how scared guys were to do anything in my sight.drak_ool said:
Actually, I have another story. I went with a female friend at the time to a pool hall. This time I walked to the restroom and on the way I could tell at least guy wanted to holler at her. I wouldn't have cared because we weren't romantically involved. I came back expecting to hear she gave him her number, but didn't hear nothing. So we get back to the car and she tells me how she saw the guy wanting to talk but he was scared. I just busted out laughing because I was surprised she didn't go talk to him.
So I mean, if your game is tight, or in my case your just intimidating, cool. But I just don't advise it because it's almost the same as dangling meat in front of a starving dog.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
NSUballer
Senior Don Juan
Im taking a girl i been 'talking to' for about 2 months to a club for new years. A really nice club where we have a VIP room upstairs above the crowd with me and a bunch of my friends.
I have no qualms about it. Im not insecure or needy. I think its gonna be a good time. Also I get to see how she acts around my friends, most of whom she doesnt know, and a club full of attractive strangers.
I have no qualms about it. Im not insecure or needy. I think its gonna be a good time. Also I get to see how she acts around my friends, most of whom she doesnt know, and a club full of attractive strangers.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
Great post, OP.
If you are worried about taking your girl to the club, you have a whole world of other problems going on there. That is just one telling sign.
Being in a relationship does not mean you stop liking music, and to dance. Going together to the club, and having a good time, means that you have a compatibility and attraction that withstands mere outside influence.
If you are worried about taking your girl to the club, you have a whole world of other problems going on there. That is just one telling sign.
Being in a relationship does not mean you stop liking music, and to dance. Going together to the club, and having a good time, means that you have a compatibility and attraction that withstands mere outside influence.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
Either way, dude, either way.Falcon25 said:
He is saying that you should be able to take a girl to the club without worry about insecure crap, and have a great time. I totally agree.
NSUballer
Senior Don Juan
Im the type that expects the worst from a female. That way I can be pleasantly suprised when she acts the way i want her to and reinforces my natural skeptical ness of females in their early twenties.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
He is not saying either way dude, he is ridiculing and calling those that don't want to be in that position as insecure. He has already decided on what to do, he is just putting down those that don't agree with him. That's where the problem comes in, dude.iqqi said:
iqqi
Master Don Juan
Falcon25 said:
I am pretty sure that he said he was referring to a couple of posts already made, as well as some of the opposing viewpoints on this thread, as insecure. Which I agree!
If you are worried about your girl, you are not secure with your girl, which means you are insecure. It is insecure to be worried about taking your girl to the club because you think other guys will be able to take her away from you or your attention.
And with this thread, he is also trying to let other readers realize, that it is FUN and OK to go to the club with a girl you are dating or in a relationship with.
Falcon25 I find it funny that you feel so offended by what I allegedly say, yet... you don't even take the time to read what I wrote!Falcon25 said:
Please go back to my very first post. I'm talking about taking 1. a date to a club and 2. your gf to a club. I believe both situations can be win-win for you (and have been for me in the past).
I never said "not taking a girl/gf to a club means you're insecure." I repeated many times during this thread that it's fine to not take her if clubs are not your thing.
However, I did say, and I keep saying it, that not taking a girl/gf to a club because you are worried about what other guys will do to her and how she will react to their advances reeks of insecurity. If you can't see why, then you still have a long journey in front of you on the road to self-fullfilment.
So, if you enjoy going to a club as a single guy, you like that scene, but as soon as you got a date/gf on your hands you stay away from them for fear of the competition, then you are insecure in my book.
To address another recurring concern of my critics: I never said clubs are the ONLY place you should take your date/gf, just one option among many others.
I wonder what kind of messed up lives some of the people have when they post about huge fights breaking out all the time in clubs, ect. I've been in a few scuffles every now and then, but the common factor ALWAYS has been alcohol, not a girl.
If you're tired of drunken nonsense and fights all the time, you should probably re-evaluate what kind of clubs you go to. There are classy nightclubs as well, believe it or not. Are you guys talking about clubbing in the third world or something, like in Lebanon, Colombia, or Detroit? Get out of the hood...
If you're tired of drunken nonsense and fights all the time, you should probably re-evaluate what kind of clubs you go to. There are classy nightclubs as well, believe it or not. Are you guys talking about clubbing in the third world or something, like in Lebanon, Colombia, or Detroit? Get out of the hood...
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
Lol, you said Detroit is a third world country.
Made me L.O.L. in real life.
Made me L.O.L. in real life.