It's a tough situation. I can't leave my social clique because this is a group of people that I've grown close to and I've spent a whole lot of time with. And I can't just ignore the one girl and say hi to everyone else, that'll be way too awkward especially in front of other girls that I want to have a potential chance with. So any advice?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
What to do when your one-itis that you nexted is in your social clique?
- Thread starter Demystify
- Start date
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Easy. Get with a new girl, or two, and bring them out with the social clique.Demystify said:It's a tough situation. I can't leave my social clique because this is a group of people that I've grown close to and I've spent a whole lot of time with. And I can't just ignore the one girl and say hi to everyone else, that'll be way too awkward especially in front of other girls that I want to have a potential chance with. So any advice?
But to what degree do I acknowledge the one-itis?, because I can't completely ignore her while saying hi and talking to everyone elsejdbman11 said:Easy. Get with a new girl, or two, and bring them out with the social clique.
She knows I'd like to hook up with her, as I've tried before but she's pushed me away, and she knows I let her under my skinjdbman11 said:Does one-itis girl know you have feelings?
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
romangod said:Why do you have oneitis for a girl you nexted? It doesn't make sense.:crazy:
Cheers!
Well, I nexted her, but because she's in my social clique it's hard to get over her and remove her as my one-itis
jophil28
Master Don Juan
THis situation is just another of life's challenges to face and push through. AT your age you need the practise.Demystify said:Well, I nexted her, but because she's in my social clique it's hard to get over her and remove her as my one-itis
Yes, you still have strong feelings for her, BUT nobody ever died from their feelings.
It could be a lot worse- she could show up with a guy who looks like Bradley Pitt and she smirks at you smugly as she walks by.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.