What methods of contact can you get?

nicksaiz65

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So I've been Cold Approaching like a madman over these past 2 weeks while I've been in school. If I'm at a bar, I always get the number. I've heard that it's not good to settle for their social media.

Now what about situations like Daygame or in class? I've found that it's much smoother to get their Snapchat/Instagram. I have fvcked chicks over just having their Snapchat before, as long as I only texted for logistics, but is it ok to get this sometimes even though the number is better?

I know I have to create my own Game as I go but I wanted to know what you guys thought.
 
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Spaz

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How is it that u r not slaying in college or university?

Girls are practically throwing themselves at boys during this age, they're experimenting and curious about sex, boys and more boys.

All you truly need is social presence and you'll be slaying pvssies in no time.

Stop talking about game and work on being being more social in ur own den.
 

nicksaiz65

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How is it that u r not slaying in college or university?

Girls are practically throwing themselves at boys during this age, they're experimenting and curious about sex, boys and more boys.

All you truly need is social presence and you'll be slaying pvssies in no time.

Stop talking about game and work on being being more social in ur own den.
It doesn't come naturally to everyone, I had zero social skills and confidence whenever I entered college. I had to work on that before I got laid, girls don't want to sleep with the awkward nerdy dude.They wanna sleep with the popular dudes.

I agree about the social stuff. I'm working on expanding my social circle as far as it can go. Going to more parties. New friends that don't suck.

But I still think you need Game. I've had girls who actively had a high initial interest in me, but then I ruined it due to a lack of Game. Hence my question. I guess in the long run the communication method doesn't matter, but I wanted to know what you all thought.

I have 2 years left in college. I've got to right every single one of my wrongs
 

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It doesn't come naturally to everyone, I had zero social skills and confidence whenever I entered college. I had to work on that before I got laid, girls don't want to sleep with the awkward nerdy dude.They wanna sleep with the popular dudes.

I agree about the social stuff. I'm working on expanding my social circle as far as it can go. Going to more parties. New friends that don't suck.

But I still think you need Game. I've had girls who actively had a high initial interest in me, but then I ruined it due to a lack of Game. Hence my question. I guess in the long run the communication method doesn't matter, but I wanted to know what you all thought.

I have 2 years left in college. I've got to right every single one of my wrongs
You think game is a process, like doing step 1-10 gets you results.

That's memorization not game.

Human interaction is not a mathematical solution but rather an emotional nuance that defies logic and rationality, its like a multitude of shades from just 1 color (red) light red, soft red, dark red, blood red, etc.

Which is why u r gonna keep on being bewildered over and over even after following those steps to the letter because you can only think in a single shade while there's lots more.

I bet u hv memorised everything in the DJ Bible after reading it again and again and yet again.

And that's not enough right? Because its not working, that's why u r asking.

So I'm telling you, ur answer is not with how to game women, it's how to understand social nuances.

That's what is missing.

Go out mingle around more, stop following game, u hv maximised everything there is to know.

Again, I repeat, learn social nuances.
 

nicksaiz65

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You think game is a process, like doing step 1-10 gets you results.

That's memorization not game.

Human interaction is not a mathematical solution but rather an emotional nuance that defies logic and rationality, its like a multitude of shades from just 1 color (red) light red, soft red, dark red, blood red, etc.

Which is why u r gonna keep on being bewildered over and over even after following those steps to the letter because you can only think in a single shade while there's lots more.

I bet u hv memorised everything in the DJ Bible after reading it again and again and yet again.

And that's not enough right? Because its not working, that's why u r asking.

So I'm telling you, ur answer is not with how to game women, it's how to understand social nuances.

That's what is missing.

Go out mingle around more, stop following game, u hv maximised everything there is to know.

Again, I repeat, learn social nuances.
Yeah I've been going out/hanging out 2x a week as of late. That lets me interact but still stay on top of my grades. Being social is gonna be key like you said.

My goal was to turn my life into an algorithm/formula so that I could have complete control over it, but I've found weirdly that when I forget all the "socializing rules" and just let go it just flows and happens naturally.

Tbh I don't trust myself enough in social/life situations to handle it without a formula, how do you just let go?
 
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Spaz

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The correct guys here to train or guide you on social interactions (for a nerd) should be those in the intellectual quadrant, I can only think of 2 intellectuals here who has a semblance of social normality, @zekko and @samspade , the rest are just too robotic or still fine tuning.

Ask them to assist you, I'm sure they'll be willing to help out.
 

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Thanks for the kind words, @Spaz . This is an interesting topic, because when I was in college I was social as hell, but my game was weak. I missed out on a lot of action. I do think you need game, to avoid being simply Mr. Nice Guy or Mr. Party Guy. I fell into that trap - so I commend you for making more of an effort than I did. (Don't worry, I got laid in college. I just wasted the opportunity.)

On the other hand, Spaz has a point. You can memorize routines and file away negs and lines, but it won't matter unless you let the socialization flow naturally. I think this is why we stress internalizing everything and converting it into a sort of energy and way of life, as opposed to a program you run every time you see a woman. In the beginning it's normal to force yourself to approach, sort of run a routine, and try to get a result, and that's fine. Otherwise a lot of newbies would never get over approach anxiety. Over time it should stop being so systematic. I guess it's like stand-up comedy...the best are just naturally funny all the time, but it took a lot of trial and error and bad sets to get there.

I think the most important thing to remember is to enjoy each moment for what it is. Another user here told me recently that there will be FAR more approaches than lays in life. Duh, right? So the approaches should not be a chore. You should be having fun and not worrying so much about outcome. As far as numbers, Snapchats, etc., obviously shoot for the moon but if she doesn't want to give a number, see what you can get. The other day I was chatting up a shy Turkish girl, and she didn't want to give me her number despite all my flirtations. (I know, wtf? haha.) I said, I'll tell you what, I'm going to give you mine, and if you ever feel like getting together, message me. She accepted that, and the interaction didn't just end there, we kept chatting a while. She probably will never reach out, BUT I've gotten lays this way. Too many guys on SS act like it's this whole "disrespect" or "low interest" thing if she doesn't hand over her number. Who cares? Go with the flow and have fun.
 

nicksaiz65

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Thanks for the kind words, @Spaz . This is an interesting topic, because when I was in college I was social as hell, but my game was weak. I missed out on a lot of action. I do think you need game, to avoid being simply Mr. Nice Guy or Mr. Party Guy. I fell into that trap - so I commend you for making more of an effort than I did. (Don't worry, I got laid in college. I just wasted the opportunity.)

On the other hand, Spaz has a point. You can memorize routines and file away negs and lines, but it won't matter unless you let the socialization flow naturally. I think this is why we stress internalizing everything and converting it into a sort of energy and way of life, as opposed to a program you run every time you see a woman. In the beginning it's normal to force yourself to approach, sort of run a routine, and try to get a result, and that's fine. Otherwise a lot of newbies would never get over approach anxiety. Over time it should stop being so systematic. I guess it's like stand-up comedy...the best are just naturally funny all the time, but it took a lot of trial and error and bad sets to get there.

I think the most important thing to remember is to enjoy each moment for what it is. Another user here told me recently that there will be FAR more approaches than lays in life. Duh, right? So the approaches should not be a chore. You should be having fun and not worrying so much about outcome. As far as numbers, Snapchats, etc., obviously shoot for the moon but if she doesn't want to give a number, see what you can get. The other day I was chatting up a shy Turkish girl, and she didn't want to give me her number despite all my flirtations. (I know, wtf? haha.) I said, I'll tell you what, I'm going to give you mine, and if you ever feel like getting together, message me. She accepted that, and the interaction didn't just end there, we kept chatting a while. She probably will never reach out, BUT I've gotten lays this way. Too many guys on SS act like it's this whole "disrespect" or "low interest" thing if she doesn't hand over her number. Who cares? Go with the flow and have fun.
Thanks for the help man. I kinda came in at zero to college, my social skills were literally non-existent. So I've been building them up the last two years. I've got two years left, so I've still got time to apply.

So I've just got to let go. Where exactly should I be focusing on to improve my social life? Lots of Cold Approaches for sure. But is it cool to have a handful of friends and go to parties, is that enough? That I could do.

And as for getting Snaps vs numbers, like you said, I suppose it doesn't matter which you get. It's preferable to get her number cause it's higher on the intimacy ladder but I did have a chick I fvcked on the first date and I only had her Snap. I just made sure to text for logistics and I was fine. I was asking because I wanted to get the contact info from this girl in class, but my gut was telling me that it was a lot to number close in class with everyone watching. So I just got her Snap instead. What do you think of that?

Although as you said in the long run I guess it doesn't matter
 
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zekko

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Thanks for the kind words, @Spaz .
Are you sure that was a compliment, lol?

Anyway, sounds like Nick is on the right track. When I was around that age, I used to try to push myself into taking every opportunity to socialize that I could, because I knew I needed the practice. You can't get good unless you practice. If a group would meet up at a bar every Thursday, I would always try to be there. If there was a party or an event, I would try to get an invite. I used to try to be involved with several different social groups that sometimes had some crossover contact. I was the type where I could relate to very different kinds of people, but I always felt that I fit in but I didn't fit in, if that makes any sense. Just don't get so caught up in your social activities that your classes suffer, that should take first priority.

I wouldn't have done well around the beginning of the PUA movement, because I don't know how they were able to analyze which stage of attraction they were in, and then pull out the proper routine or memorized line to say. When I socialized, I had to be out of my head (putting my focus outself myself). Analyzing and using routines like that would put me back in my head.

As for Snapchat, sure it would be better to have a number, but why break a potential contact? You don't want to appear serious, or even worse butthurt, over it. Besides, it never hurts to have some pictures of some pretty girls. You might even see someone you like in there and ask about her.
 
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I was asking because I wanted to get the contact info from this girl in class, but my gut was telling me that it was a lot to number close in class with everyone watching. So I just got her Snap instead. What do you think of that?
I number close in front of strangers all the time. It's something you have to get used to. Asking for a number in the grand scheme of things is meaningless. And whatever thoughts those others have say more about them than you. In so many words, they WISH they could be so bold. But if you're not at that point, getting her Snap is fine...the number is better and also a bold move which the woman will respect more.
 

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I number close in front of strangers all the time. It's something you have to get used to. Asking for a number in the grand scheme of things is meaningless. And whatever thoughts those others have say more about them than you. In so many words, they WISH they could be so bold. But if you're not at that point, getting her Snap is fine...the number is better and also a bold move which the woman will respect more.
Same here. But what shocked me the most about cold approaching and closing in front of other people is that:
1. The girl can feel and appreciate the confidence it takes for you to do this. It's a HUGE turn-on for her.
2. The men who watch are usually impressed, not jealous.
3. The women who watch get turned on too lol. A recent approach I did on the train. When the girl got off the train after our 15 minute interaction, all these old ladies sitting nearby just sat there smiling at me, likely wishing the same thing would happen to them.

We've been so brainwashed to think approaching and closing is a bad or dirty thing but women love it. I can't tell you the number of times women have thanked me for approaching them at the end of our interactions. Even if she has a boyfriend, you will make her day and that's good energy to put out into the world. It will come back to you.
 

nicksaiz65

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I number close in front of strangers all the time. It's something you have to get used to. Asking for a number in the grand scheme of things is meaningless. And whatever thoughts those others have say more about them than you. In so many words, they WISH they could be so bold. But if you're not at that point, getting her Snap is fine...the number is better and also a bold move which the woman will respect more.
Nice. I number closed an HB8 at a wedding today in front of some people. Got curved, but I'm still proud of myself for making the approach/effort
 

nicksaiz65

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Same here. But what shocked me the most about cold approaching and closing in front of other people is that:
1. The girl can feel and appreciate the confidence it takes for you to do this. It's a HUGE turn-on for her.
2. The men who watch are usually impressed, not jealous.
3. The women who watch get turned on too lol. A recent approach I did on the train. When the girl got off the train after our 15 minute interaction, all these old ladies sitting nearby just sat there smiling at me, likely wishing the same thing would happen to them.

We've been so brainwashed to think approaching and closing is a bad or dirty thing but women love it. I can't tell you the number of times women have thanked me for approaching them at the end of our interactions. Even if she has a boyfriend, you will make her day and that's good energy to put out into the world. It will come back to you.
It's that Blue Pill Programming man. Gotta destroy it lol.

And that's interesting! So that kills the "I don't know if she has a boyfriend" excuse. I assume it's a social faux pas to directly ask if she has a boyfriend though?
 

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It's that Blue Pill Programming man. Gotta destroy it lol.

And that's interesting! So that kills the "I don't know if she has a boyfriend" excuse. I assume it's a social faux pas to directly ask if she has a boyfriend though?
It's not an outright faux pas in my opinion, but it's not the direction I'd want to go. Asking just reminds her and can short-circuit the conversation. You can take the conversation wherever you want to, so why bring up potential competition (or give her an idea for an excuse early on)? With day game, or any game really, remember that you want to qualify her. She "seems" cool, but you'd like to get to know her better, etc. You're getting to know her and seeing if she's a psycho or not, lol. So whether she has a boyfriend is immaterial to you since you don't even know if you'd let her into your apartment, or let her sleep with you. All the while you are building rapport and comfort.

And girls are gonna do what they're gonna do. She may lie and say she has one to let you off easy. She may say she has one but not turn you down for a meet. She may not mention she has one at all even if she does. It's her life. But when you bring it up, you make it the fulcrum for the whole interaction, if that makes sense.
 
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nicksaiz65

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It's not an outright faux pas in my opinion, but it's not the direction I'd want to go. Asking just reminds her and can short-circuit the conversation. You can take the conversation wherever you want to, so why bring up potential competition (or give her an idea for an excuse early on)? With day game, or any game really, remember that you want to qualify her. She "seems" cool, but you'd like to get to know her better, etc. You're getting to know her and seeing if she's a psycho or not, lol. So whether she has a boyfriend is immaterial to you since you don't even know if you'd let her into your apartment, or let her sleep with you. All the while you are building rapport and comfort.

And girls are gonna do what they're gonna do. She may lie and say she has one to let you off easy. She may say she has one but not turn you down for a meet. She may not mention she has one at all even if she does. It's her life. But when you bring it up, you make it the fulcrum for the whole interaction, if that makes sense.
That makes perfect sense. Thanks. I'll keep this in mind as I continue to Cold Approach. I'd like to meet more women through Bars and Daygame, plus the more I play the numbers' game the more likely I'll get laid. I'll continue to put myself out there socially just like Spaz said as well. I hope 2 years is enough time for me to correct not slaying in college(because it should come pretty easily)
 

nicksaiz65

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Also, @samspade do you have any tips on not giving a fvck in general when it comes to asking girls out in shared environments(not work?)
I've worked on my Cold Approach to the point where I don't care if I get rejected at all anymore, it doesn't faze me one bit. But whenever I see other cute girls in my class: those kind of "approach anxiety" thoughts come back, y'know? Like "What if she rejects me? Wouldn't that be embarrassing?" I guess the solution would be to get out of my head and stop overanalyzing, lift, and go for what I want without giving a fvck right?
 

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Also, @samspade do you have any tips on not giving a fvck in general when it comes to asking girls out in shared environments(not work?)
I've worked on my Cold Approach to the point where I don't care if I get rejected at all anymore, it doesn't faze me one bit. But whenever I see other cute girls in my class: those kind of "approach anxiety" thoughts come back, y'know? Like "What if she rejects me? Wouldn't that be embarrassing?" I guess the solution would be to get out of my head and stop overanalyzing, lift, and go for what I want without giving a fvck right?
That's your ego at work and it's a powerful but sometimes useless tool.

You're already halfway there...you don't care during cold approaches. Why should you care in class?

And, it's been a while since college. When exactly in class do you "approach"? Before, after, during, etc.

First, "rejects" is a strong word. Think of it as a pass. Just like you might pass on the creamed corn at Thanksgiving. It's not your cup of tea.

And so what if she passes on your offer? And then what? That's what you have to ask yourself whenever you fear an outcome. X happens, and then what? And work it out from there.

Your ego is building a scenario wherein you are ostracized from the group. You know that is a ridiculous outcome.

But what might happen? Someone could laugh at you. So what. She could be a bytch about it. So what.

Just own it. Of COURSE you want to get to know her. You're a man, she's a cute girl. When a girl turns me down, I keep a shyt-eating grin and usually say something like "well can you blame me? I had to ask." Play around with it. "Too bad, you'll miss out." But ALWAYS be smiling and happy. The mindset is always "you SEEM cool, I'd like to offer you a shot to get to know me better. If not, no worries." And instead of embarrassment if she says no, be thinking and project, "well, I tried, you suckers."
 

nicksaiz65

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That's your ego at work and it's a powerful but sometimes useless tool.

You're already halfway there...you don't care during cold approaches. Why should you care in class?

And, it's been a while since college. When exactly in class do you "approach"? Before, after, during, etc.

First, "rejects" is a strong word. Think of it as a pass. Just like you might pass on the creamed corn at Thanksgiving. It's not your cup of tea.

And so what if she passes on your offer? And then what? That's what you have to ask yourself whenever you fear an outcome. X happens, and then what? And work it out from there.

Your ego is building a scenario wherein you are ostracized from the group. You know that is a ridiculous outcome.

But what might happen? Someone could laugh at you. So what. She could be a bytch about it. So what.

Just own it. Of COURSE you want to get to know her. You're a man, she's a cute girl. When a girl turns me down, I keep a shyt-eating grin and usually say something like "well can you blame me? I had to ask." Play around with it. "Too bad, you'll miss out." But ALWAYS be smiling and happy. The mindset is always "you SEEM cool, I'd like to offer you a shot to get to know me better. If not, no worries." And instead of embarrassment if she says no, be thinking and project, "well, I tried, you suckers."
Hey bro. Thought I'd get some more real life experience before I updated this thread again so it's not just theory.

You were right, it was all ego. I've put in some more practice and now getting numbers/Snapchats in front of others easily. I practiced and now I literally just don't care anymore lol. I don't care if they have boyfriends anymore either. I know this cause I've gotten 7 new numbers so far
 
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nicksaiz65

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The correct guys here to train or guide you on social interactions (for a nerd) should be those in the intellectual quadrant, I can only think of 2 intellectuals here who has a semblance of social normality, @zekko and @samspade , the rest are just too robotic or still fine tuning.

Ask them to assist you, I'm sure they'll be willing to help out.
Spaz... I've taken your advice and I'm seeing some results. I've been actively out there socializing, making friends, and inviting people to hang out. I've gotten 2 makeouts from it, no Lays just yet. I'll fix that this weekend though. I do this all after my school work is done of course. Someone even told me they were "glad they met me cause I'm a cool dude."

But do you have any tips on the trendy "party life" type stuff? I'll keep making friends but I'm usually either at bars or just hanging at people's houses. I was kind of embarrassed cause someone texted me on a Friday night asking "what's the move?" And I honestly couldn't even answer. I usually just go to work with my band, get some drinks, and do some approaches. Being in college, I need to start going to frat parties and make more friends with them I guess. Do you have any tips? I'm just not sure if I wanna ask my friends "what's the move?" Seems kinda low value imo. Or am I just tripping?

Also, not being a fvcking pvssy and going to the club/hookah bar once a week would probably hurt immensely.
 
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