"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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What happened here and how did i handle it?

ronniel

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To cut the long story short, she is a hb 8.5, 11 years younger than me.
She is living about 380 miles away. We saw each other every weekend, for about 2 1/2 months.

Initially very attracted to me, then she started to fade away. The whole time i didn't try to smother her with text messages, just one-two per week and then i used to propose to meet.

Last time we talked, i proposed to meet again. She said that we should not meet and see how things would work out. I asked for clarification and she responded with, i don't know. do you see this thing working?

I responded with yes, i agree this thing doesn't work. lets end it. bye.

What happened here?
It's been 5 days and had no news from her.
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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betheman

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Its an LTR, the odds of those things working are hugely stacked against it.
who travelled to see who?
 

st_99

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LDR + Young girl = dont bother analyzing.

enjoy the memories, move on, nothing here to see. :D
 

Greasy Pig

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Young chicks are very insecure and have a fairytale view of romance and relationships.
The 22yo chick I was seeing last year ended it when I had to move 100km (60 miles) away for work.
All my LTRs before her were 60 miles away and it worked well but they were older women. The did sometimes complain by saying shyt like: "If I just need a hug or I'm feeling spontaneous and want to do something, you're an hour away."
Don't take it personally, just respect her decision and move on.
Still, I have to say that 380 miles is a long way to go for some poon.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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ronniel

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Well, we didn't even talk about having a relationship though. Guess this is what she felt that the thing was.

Anyway, i think that handled all this the right way, maintaining my respect and self control.

Thanks guys.
 

ronniel

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I still wonder, is it because she lost attraction for me or is it just the distance itself?

Also, did i act right saying to end the whole thing. I did it because i sensed that she was not so interested anymore, so i bailed out first.
 

Boilermaker

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Good call.

Who knows why she lost attraction, as the old Scara would say?... Another lollipop finished, brother, you handled it perfectly.

Pre-emptive strikes like this have shock and awe effect and you'll surely be remembered as "one of those different ones" throughout her life.

Good Luck!
 

ronniel

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Cool, i like to know i acted the best i could.
Another question. What to do if she contacts me again? I sense that her bruised ego will make her do it.
Do i stay complete nc or do i play it indifferent but friendly?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Boilermaker

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She may not contact, but if she does, my suggestion would be to not reply.

I am not a woman-hater, but in my own life, I have seen that sticking to my decision of NEXT strictly (especially in the beginning) helped reduce my dependent tendencies. I killed that cowardly romantic inside me.

I don't think she deserves your attention or friendliness. Save that for someone who actually deserves it.
 

zengame

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She probably felt the relationship was going nowhere if you rarely talked except to make plans to hookup.
 

SecondHalf

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You slept with her on weekends.
You didn't keep in tight contact throughout the week.

Well, we didn't even talk about having a relationship though. Guess this is what she felt that the thing was.
She wanted more I think.

However, if you don't feel slighted (and likely you shouldn't), if she called, why not go get some more? The distance is quite a distance, but if it works....

SH
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Scaramouche

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Dear Ronny,
You handled it well,now forget about her and start exploring ever dating opportunity...Should she return (and I think she will),then just treat her as another option!
 

ronniel

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**UPDATE**
Well, she started trying to get my attention, through her blog page. Posting songs that we used to listen when at my place and stuff like that.
I won't bite. If she makes a more concrete move, i will think about it.
 

origin138

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st_99 said:
LDR + Young girl = dont bother analyzing.

enjoy the memories, move on, nothing here to see. :D
st_99's reply may seem short and to the point, but it's as accurate as it gets. Move on.

Boilermaker said:
I don't think she deserves your attention or friendliness. Save that for someone who actually deserves it.
Also excellent.
 

VladPatton

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Kudos man, damn you nailed her with a swifty! Well played.

Sorta like:

"I wonder who would win in a fight between us?"
*punch in the face...KO!!*

The End.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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