"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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What does a squinting eye smile with partially raised eyebrows mean?

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sharpshooter

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I made the most random cold approach tonight. I saw these two chicks at the drug store while I was buying some lens solution. They came outside shortly after I got in my car. So I pulled up to their car, rolled down my window and motioned to them to roll down theres. I asked "hey are there any good clubs around this area, i'm not from here"

that's when the driver girl gave me a raised eyebrow type of smile while she was somewhat pinching her eyes, that's how she was talking to me the entire time. It almost looked like she was worried, or nervous. She told me to go downtown, and I didn't know how to react to her weird smirk, so I was like ok thanks, and drove off. That was one of hte weirdest smiles i've got. It was almost like she was intimidated
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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ScrewIt

Master Don Juan
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maybe she was thinking:

is this guy trying to ask if me to go clubbing with him?

that probably hit her mind when you popped your question
 
J

jakethasnake

Master Don Juan
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Haha... that was a weak approach. There was no real CONTEXT, that was the problem. You guys are buying saline solution at the freakin drug store, and outta no where you ask if there are any good clubs around. She probably thought you were going to go to a club and squirt that shyt all over people. :D


Next time, remember CONTEXT when you approach. The approach has to be somewhat natural.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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sharpshooter

Senior Don Juan
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ok so what would have been a good approach there. I really didnt' care. I made it seem like I wasn't from the area and that I was going out tonight I don't know :confused:
 
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