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We just broke up and shes giving me a month to get out!!!

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orbit123

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Hi guys,

So the bomb was dropped on me last night. The signs were on the wall that she was gonna break up with me. My name is not on the rental lease. She kept on saying I had to help out more around the house, get along with her daughter, get a job, and much more. I have 15K saved up and no job and the rents in my area are 2k per month. I also have full custody of my 10 year old son. She is only giving me 30 days to get out. My mind is cloudy right now from the shock of all of this. The relationship is definitely over. I need a game plan from all of you for what I should be doing because I only have a month to get out. Thanks
 

SW15

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You need a job first and foremost. Job search is going to be a bigger priority than getting laid right now.

Why would a woman keep an unemployed man around? Most women have vaginas that are massively in demand, even single moms. Most men who find themselves unemployed will lose their romantic relationships during their unemployment period unless they are tattooed dirtbags whose SMV is not at all tied to their employment status. The typical white collar guy gets fuccked over while he's unemployed.

Unemployment is a major risk factor in losing a girlfriend and it's not a good position for impressing new women. It's not easy to get laid while unemployed, despite former PUA Roosh's legendary article on getting laid while unemployed. In the early 2010s, Roosh wrote an article about being unemployed, living in his dad's basement as a male in his early 30s, and getting laid. Roosh's article about getting laid while unemployed seemed easy in principle but difficult to execute in practice.


Your game is to get out and get money/a job. You might have to live with your parents/other relatives to preserve your $15,000 in savings.
 

logicallefty

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Places are begging for workers right now, at least in my area. Several of my favorite restaurants have closed because they didn't have enough help. Why aren't you working?
 

SW15

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Places are begging for workers right now, at least in my area. Several of my favorite restaurants have closed because they didn't have enough help. Why aren't you working?
This is going to change very soon, if it hasn't already. Do you remember during the late 2000s/early 2010s when there were stories about 500 applicants per every McJob that opened? That's going to start happening again.

I've worked for employers that got 200+ applicants every time they posted a job, regardless of economic conditions.
 

logicallefty

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This is going to change very soon, if it hasn't already. Do you remember during the late 2000s/early 2010s when there were stories about 500 applicants per every McJob that opened? That's going to start happening again.

I've worked for employers that got 200+ applicants every time they posted a job, regardless of economic conditions.
Yep I completely agree. The end of the gravy train for people who "choose" not to work is coming. I won't be feeding any of them. As a man who works three jobs, I have no mercy when it comes to this subject. Go get a damn job or go to the homeless shelter, those are my answers.
 

Barrister

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OP,

So you have custody of your own son and you and he are both living at your GF's and she is supporting YOU and him and you have no job? And you are shocked by the fact that she said enough is enough? I mean no disrespect, but I don't blame her for telling you to leave. There is nothing worse than an unemployed man who wants to mooch off his girlfriend or his parents. The fact she had told you before to get a job and you didn't makes me think you have been existing in this state for some time.

Do you not have any self-respect? And no job but you have full custody of your son who is depending on you. This goes way deeper than the relationship with your now ex-girlfriend. Your plan consists of a single step and that is getting employment. Period.
 

We_ArE_VeNOM

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Hi guys,

So the bomb was dropped on me last night. The signs were on the wall that she was gonna break up with me. My name is not on the rental lease. She kept on saying I had to help out more around the house, get along with her daughter, get a job, and much more. I have 15K saved up and no job and the rents in my area are 2k per month. I also have full custody of my 10 year old son. She is only giving me 30 days to get out. My mind is cloudy right now from the shock of all of this. The relationship is definitely over. I need a game plan from all of you for what I should be doing because I only have a month to get out. Thanks
Caught with your pants down, eh.

You should have already had a job, fam.

I recommend getting your class A cdl's or joining the military.

Both have worked for me and both are great for getting your life back on track.
 

Snag87

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Well, from a legal perspective you don't have to listen...



..."If you have lived at the home for a period of time, then you are considered a tenant and an occupant of the residence. This means you have a legal right to be in the residence and your partner cannot simply go get a no-trespass order to keep you off the property. Your boyfriend also cannot simply change the locks and kick you out of the house if you have stayed past your welcome. There is a certain process that much be followed, just as though your boyfriend were a landlord – that would be an eviction.

Now, a lot of people decide to move on without that process because, really – who wants to stay living in a place that is not happy and where you are not wanted?"
 

Billtx49

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Well, from a legal perspective you don't have to listen...



..."If you have lived at the home for a period of time, then you are considered a tenant and an occupant of the residence. This means you have a legal right to be in the residence and your partner cannot simply go get a no-trespass order to keep you off the property. Your boyfriend also cannot simply change the locks and kick you out of the house if you have stayed past your welcome. There is a certain process that much be followed, just as though your boyfriend were a landlord – that would be an eviction.

Now, a lot of people decide to move on without that process because, really – who wants to stay living in a place that is not happy and where you are not wanted?"
I would think unless he’s on the lease he’s not a legal tenant and can be argued against that he’s only a short or long term guest of the tenant …
 

adanricci

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I would think unless he’s on the lease he’s not a legal tenant and can be argued against that he’s only a short or long term guest of the tenant …
There may be a rule about verbal agreements. I'm sure at some point they agreed to live together. Depends on the country/state. Maybe OP can get a lawyer who does probono work to figure out his options.
 

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I would think unless he’s on the lease he’s not a legal tenant and can be argued against that he’s only a short or long term guest of the tenant …
"If you have lived at the home for a period of time, then you are considered a tenant and an occupant of the residence."

Law is pretty clear. If he lives there he's a resident. Whether his name is on the lease is irrelevant.
 

Billtx49

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"If you have lived at the home for a period of time, then you are considered a tenant and an occupant of the residence."

Law is pretty clear. If he lives there he's a resident. Whether his name is on the lease is irrelevant.
Property codes vary by state. The main paragraph in the Texas code is :

6) "Tenant" means a person who is authorized by a lease to occupy a dwelling to the exclusion of others and, for the purposes of Subchapters D, E, and F, who is obligated under the lease to pay rent.
An oral lease can usually be implied by lease payments to the landlord. Otherwise, hard to prove via he said, she said testimony.
 

Snag87

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Property codes vary by state. The main paragraph in the Texas code is :

6) "Tenant" means a person who is authorized by a lease to occupy a dwelling to the exclusion of others and, for the purposes of Subchapters D, E, and F, who is obligated under the lease to pay rent.
An oral lease can usually be proved by lease payments to the landlord. Otherwise, hard to prove via he said, she said testimony.
Doesn't matter. Still have to legally evict, even in Texas: "
If they signed a lease, and are in default (say for not paying rent), then the landlord can evict them as they would any other tenant in breach of a lease.

If there is no lease, the girlfriend or boyfriend is essentially a squatter. Texas does not permit "self-help" evictions, meaning that it is not permissible for you to change the locks and throw all their belongings on the lawn. You must go through the evictions process established by law."
 

Snag87

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As previously addressed, the real question is do you really want to stay in such a situation? I certainly wouldn't. However, if OP can't find a place to stay within a month, and would literally be out on the street, I want him to know it's an option.
 

SW15

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As previously addressed, the real question is do you really want to stay in such a situation? I certainly wouldn't. However, if OP can't find a place to stay within a month, and would literally be out on the street, I want him to know it's an option.
Does @orbit123 have parents or siblings? Living with parents or siblings is way better than trying to use the legal system to stay living with his now ex-girlfriend.
 

logicallefty

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"If you have lived at the home for a period of time, then you are considered a tenant and an occupant of the residence."

Law is pretty clear. If he lives there he's a resident. Whether his name is on the lease is irrelevant.
This is true in my state. Lease is irrelevant.

What she could try to do is go through the formal landlord/tenant eviction process and push it through the legal system. With no written lease (I am assuming there isn't one in OP's case) it would be difficult for her. But if she had enough evidence to present to a Judge about him being a deadbeat then it might work. But would be a difficult process with no written lease.

The other option is for her to move out. I know a guy who did this with his son. The son was a 23 x year old deadbeat. It was father and son in a small rental house. Noone else lived there. Father paying and working and son doing nothing. After trying to get the son to contribute, the father just broke the lease and moved out himself. Refused to let the son into the new house. Told the son "You are welcome to stay (in the old house) when I move out, but you will have to take over the lease". The son thought dad was bluffing and didn't take it seriously. Son pushed it to the last day dad was moving out. Dad moved his stuff to the new house, threw the son's crap on the curb, and left. Told the son "Good luck" and gave him directions to the homeless shelter. Boss like move.
 

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Does @orbit123 have parents or siblings? Living with parents or siblings is way better than trying to use the legal system to stay living with his now ex-girlfriend.
Haha. I'd rather sleep in the woods than live with my mom. And I'm deadly serious about that.
 

Snag87

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This is true in my state. Lease is irrelevant.

What she could try to do is go through the formal landlord/tenant eviction process and push it through the legal system. With no written lease (I am assuming there isn't one in OP's case) it would be difficult for her. But if she had enough evidence to present to a Judge about him being a deadbeat then it might work. But would be a difficult process with no written lease.

The other option is for her to move out. I know a guy who did this with his son. The son was a 23 x year old deadbeat. It was father and son in a small rental house. Noone else lived there. Father paying and working and son doing nothing. After trying to get the son to contribute, the father just broke the lease and moved out himself. Refused to let the son into the new house. Told the son "You are welcome to stay (in the old house) when I move out, but you will have to take over the lease". The son thought dad was bluffing and didn't take it seriously. Son pushed it to the last day dad was moving out. Dad moved his stuff to the new house, threw the son's crap on the curb, and left. Told the son "Good luck" and gave him directions to the homeless shelter. Boss like move.
It takes months and costs thousands to legally evict someone. Many landlords will pay a non-paying tenant to leave (cash for keys) rather than go through the court system. Moving out makes more sense, but I'm unsure whether you can legally force the squatter out with you, if you can't, I would assume you'd be held responsible for all damage and legal fees incurred by the landlord.
 

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Usually, even without a lease a roommate who is living at a place is considered a "tenant at sufferance" and it still requires that you file an eviction action in a court to get them out. That usually moves fairly quickly (in relation to other court proceedings that is), but it is not something where you can call the police up and they are going to throw the person out on their head without a second thought simply because their name isn't on a written lease for the place. They will usually tell you it is a civil matter and to get a writ of assistance from a court of law.
 

corrector

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It takes months and costs thousands to legally evict someone. Many landlords will pay a non-paying tenant to leave (cash for keys) rather than go through the court system. Moving out makes more sense, but I'm unsure whether you can legally force the squatter out with you, if you can't, I would assume you'd be held responsible for all damage and legal fees incurred by the landlord.
If she wants to get nasty with him she can weaponize the police and he could end up in jail depending on the type of officer that responds to the call. Especially in America people get the police involved in what should be civil issues. If he even gets charged with a felony for domestic abuse it will make it even more difficult to find a job since most jobs screen for criminal records plus his own daugher could end up in child protective services. If I were him I would try to make this gf happy or get out of there in that 30 days.
 
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