I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Hehe not quite yet big guy (Got another one today at the gym).Originally posted by Walden
So this is my invitation, I'm going to go and do 30 rejections in 30 days (as close to 1 every day as I can).
Congratulations! One question, since you are on a suceessful run, are you going to keep your emphasis on rejections?Originally posted by Walden
Okay so these weren't rejections , they wer e both successful closes . One on a hot blonde triathlete (to come to my comedy gig tomorrow night) and one on a cute (but interesting) biologist (to come to the same gig )
I got about five minutes after pur convo and realised I'd double booked myself (BAH!).
The biologist was just sitting in the common room talking to some guys I doidn't know so I went up and introduced myself to all of them , joked oin them all a bit and then closed the girl . Money!
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
What is the opener you are working with?Originally posted by Walden
Work sent me to do some sht in another town and I did some good CAs there. Have been practicing with one particular opener and just knowing that I have one prepared helps a lot. Did 3 CAs there.
Then last night my buddies and I went clubbing and I rocked about 6 CAs. It's easier to work high numbers in a club because you can just do approach after approach and it doesn't matter so much the result.
Am starting to get over my fear of rejection again.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Holy fucking shit, thats the craziest mindtrick I've ever heard. Next time you see a girl, picture her lusting for you with a tempting bit of whipcream on the corner of her lips, then see if you can still approach.Originally posted by Walden
2 more today. The mind trick I'm using is a kind of weird NLP trick.
What I do is I imagine some ridiculous cartoonish thing about the girl I'm looking at. For example as I approach I imagine her getting hit in the face with an imaginary custard pei , and then picture her with custard dripping off her face, or I imagne she has brightly coloured tree frogs nesting in her hair.
Yes I know it's silly, but for some reason this screws with my brian's conditioning and so i don't tell myself to be scared.
Wierd huh?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.