"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Very good article on BODYLANGUAGE!!!
- Thread starter ChrizZ
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Mr.Positive
Master Don Juan
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Good article, thanks for sharing it.
I especially liked this:
"A smile is often used to gain approval or validation, ease uncomfortable moments, or show acceptance. Jimmy rarely used his smile in these ways. He didn’t smile when expected. He smiled on his terms. He reacted to people less than they reacted to him.
How Did James Use His Smile?
James Dean used to smile to give approval, not to get it. If you answered a question in a manner that pleased him, then he’d smile. If you said something that amused him, he’d smile. Jimmy smiled to reward you for doing something he liked. He did not smile to be rewarded. He made people pay for his coy, self-satisfied smirkish grin and he generally did not smile to appear friendly."
I especially liked this:
"A smile is often used to gain approval or validation, ease uncomfortable moments, or show acceptance. Jimmy rarely used his smile in these ways. He didn’t smile when expected. He smiled on his terms. He reacted to people less than they reacted to him.
How Did James Use His Smile?
James Dean used to smile to give approval, not to get it. If you answered a question in a manner that pleased him, then he’d smile. If you said something that amused him, he’d smile. Jimmy smiled to reward you for doing something he liked. He did not smile to be rewarded. He made people pay for his coy, self-satisfied smirkish grin and he generally did not smile to appear friendly."
MotownMack
Senior Don Juan
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I didn't like the part about not smiling or trying to look to intense.
I am sure there is a time and place for these methods, but when it comes to initial attraction, looking "tough" or too intense is a big turn off to women. I know, because I was naturally an intense guy, and did not pay off for me.
Again, it's not that I don't see any merit in the concepts, I do. But I think you're far better off smiling more and making the error on the side of caution, than you are trying to use these more "advanced" techniques.
The rest of article was decent though.
I am sure there is a time and place for these methods, but when it comes to initial attraction, looking "tough" or too intense is a big turn off to women. I know, because I was naturally an intense guy, and did not pay off for me.
Again, it's not that I don't see any merit in the concepts, I do. But I think you're far better off smiling more and making the error on the side of caution, than you are trying to use these more "advanced" techniques.
The rest of article was decent though.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
I liked the part about the smile. I don't agree with the bit about looking too intense though.MotownMack said:
If you have an easy/open expression and only smile when you are impressed it sends out a signal to the woman that she has to qualify herself.
I think the thing with smiling is that when talking to people, you will naturally agree with most things they're saying and most of what they're saying will be fluff talk. Smiling when there is no need makes you seem like you're trying too hard.
Nice, thanks ChrizZ, your always diggin up good stuff.
I think I smile too much. In fact girls have even said 'your always smiling'. I thought this was a good thing. I'm an open playfull guy, confident and I do somewhat do the first things on the list, but I just seem to always be smiling because I'm easily amused and self-amused. Not exactly 'badass'. But then again I might have to change that if I want to get laid...
I think I smile too much. In fact girls have even said 'your always smiling'. I thought this was a good thing. I'm an open playfull guy, confident and I do somewhat do the first things on the list, but I just seem to always be smiling because I'm easily amused and self-amused. Not exactly 'badass'. But then again I might have to change that if I want to get laid...
MotownMack
Senior Don Juan
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^^^ I really don't think smiling too much is holding you back. You probably have problems elsewhere. That's kind of like being "too good looking". Yeah, it could occasionally intimidate someone or work against you, but far more often than not, it's a good "problem" to have.
Haha MowtownMack I never said it was keeping me back it just seems contradictory to the article. I'm not putting any problem of mine down to smiling. I really hate it when guys complain about being good looking.