"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Very good article on BODYLANGUAGE!!!
- Thread starter ChrizZ
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Mr.Positive
Master Don Juan
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Good article, thanks for sharing it.
I especially liked this:
"A smile is often used to gain approval or validation, ease uncomfortable moments, or show acceptance. Jimmy rarely used his smile in these ways. He didn’t smile when expected. He smiled on his terms. He reacted to people less than they reacted to him.
How Did James Use His Smile?
James Dean used to smile to give approval, not to get it. If you answered a question in a manner that pleased him, then he’d smile. If you said something that amused him, he’d smile. Jimmy smiled to reward you for doing something he liked. He did not smile to be rewarded. He made people pay for his coy, self-satisfied smirkish grin and he generally did not smile to appear friendly."
I especially liked this:
"A smile is often used to gain approval or validation, ease uncomfortable moments, or show acceptance. Jimmy rarely used his smile in these ways. He didn’t smile when expected. He smiled on his terms. He reacted to people less than they reacted to him.
How Did James Use His Smile?
James Dean used to smile to give approval, not to get it. If you answered a question in a manner that pleased him, then he’d smile. If you said something that amused him, he’d smile. Jimmy smiled to reward you for doing something he liked. He did not smile to be rewarded. He made people pay for his coy, self-satisfied smirkish grin and he generally did not smile to appear friendly."
MotownMack
Senior Don Juan
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I didn't like the part about not smiling or trying to look to intense.
I am sure there is a time and place for these methods, but when it comes to initial attraction, looking "tough" or too intense is a big turn off to women. I know, because I was naturally an intense guy, and did not pay off for me.
Again, it's not that I don't see any merit in the concepts, I do. But I think you're far better off smiling more and making the error on the side of caution, than you are trying to use these more "advanced" techniques.
The rest of article was decent though.
I am sure there is a time and place for these methods, but when it comes to initial attraction, looking "tough" or too intense is a big turn off to women. I know, because I was naturally an intense guy, and did not pay off for me.
Again, it's not that I don't see any merit in the concepts, I do. But I think you're far better off smiling more and making the error on the side of caution, than you are trying to use these more "advanced" techniques.
The rest of article was decent though.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
I liked the part about the smile. I don't agree with the bit about looking too intense though.MotownMack said:
If you have an easy/open expression and only smile when you are impressed it sends out a signal to the woman that she has to qualify herself.
I think the thing with smiling is that when talking to people, you will naturally agree with most things they're saying and most of what they're saying will be fluff talk. Smiling when there is no need makes you seem like you're trying too hard.
Nice, thanks ChrizZ, your always diggin up good stuff.
I think I smile too much. In fact girls have even said 'your always smiling'. I thought this was a good thing. I'm an open playfull guy, confident and I do somewhat do the first things on the list, but I just seem to always be smiling because I'm easily amused and self-amused. Not exactly 'badass'. But then again I might have to change that if I want to get laid...
I think I smile too much. In fact girls have even said 'your always smiling'. I thought this was a good thing. I'm an open playfull guy, confident and I do somewhat do the first things on the list, but I just seem to always be smiling because I'm easily amused and self-amused. Not exactly 'badass'. But then again I might have to change that if I want to get laid...
MotownMack
Senior Don Juan
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^^^ I really don't think smiling too much is holding you back. You probably have problems elsewhere. That's kind of like being "too good looking". Yeah, it could occasionally intimidate someone or work against you, but far more often than not, it's a good "problem" to have.
Haha MowtownMack I never said it was keeping me back it just seems contradictory to the article. I'm not putting any problem of mine down to smiling. I really hate it when guys complain about being good looking.