"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Valentines Day card (awwww!)

diplomatic_lie

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Heh, I saw this cute card on the Adam Sandler site:

To my Valentine,
You're as pretty as roses,
If I bring a camera,
Will you do some nude poses?

I always wanna be with you,
There or across the border,
I'd love to follow you forever,
If not for that restraining order.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Spike_the_Dragon

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I made a valentines card when I was a kid once. I drew a picture of an actual human heart on the cover. Needless to say, she never talked to me again after that (actually, if I remember correctly she never talked to me before that either!).


Ahh, didn't you just love high school? Things have changed soo much it is hard to believe sometimes.:D





P.S. I still play with crayons.:p
 

Bonhomme

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LOL

Good one.

Spike, I also made one with an anatomically correct heart and sent it to this sort of beatnik/goth artist chick I used to hang out with, and she loved it.

She kept it and put it up on her wall.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Spike_the_Dragon

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Ha ha ha.

You know its funny... nowadays women buy flowers for me!

I used to have a major crush on this goth chick back in school... what a stupida$$ I was. I don't think that b!tch ever once smiled (unless she was thinking about dead puppies or something). Anyways, I think I'm gonna stay away from the vampire babes from now on.

Goth chicks can be hazardous to your health... keep a safe distance. ;)
 

AC/DC

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Originally posted by Spike_the_Dragon

I used to have a major crush on this goth chick back in school... what a stupida$$ I was. I don't think that b!tch ever once smiled (unless she was thinking about dead puppies or something). Anyways, I think I'm gonna stay away from the vampire babes from now on.

Goth chicks can be hazardous to your health... keep a safe distance. ;)
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

That's great! :D
 

Hot Ice

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Haaaaahahhahah! The best fvcking-Valentines thread ever! :D


Oh yeah. They always had that buy a rose thing. Of course I went for it and bought one for a girl I had a crush on. She never spoke to me again afterwards.
Oh, yeah?? And why is that? :p
 

AlexTheGreat

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hahaha ... I just bought a christmas "canne-o-gramme" (they distribute christmas candy ..)

lol I think I'm gonna send it to myself, just for ****s and giggles lol
 

Bonhomme

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LOL

I forgot to mention the goth chick put my valentine up on the wall next to her shrunken heads.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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