"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Unconsistency
- Thread starter Alive
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Out of curiosity, are the days when you feel confident days in which you haven't masturbated in a while? And are the days where you feel unconfident 1-2 days after you've masturbated?Alive said:Its odd....some days I'll feel confident and talk to maybe a girl or 2 a day. Then some days I'll walk into school and feel totally not confident to do what I need to do. Does anyone else get this? What might the cause be?
I dont masturbate...Brighty said:Out of curiosity, are the days when you feel confident days in which you haven't masturbated in a while? And are the days where you feel unconfident 1-2 days after you've masturbated?
theobserver
Don Juan
strauss' book also says similar things, and gives examples on how to reframe your mindset. but that's what its all about, reframing your mindset. what you think you will become. the way i convinced myself is how much better i feel when i'm in that strong frame, and that's i'd rather live life in this frame than in any other ones, because to me it's empowering. so give yourself reasons to get into that mindset, and it'll happen naturally. hope i helped. good luck man.Snow Plowman said:Exactly, its like your interpretation of reality. If you look back at some of the natural's I write about, some of them think they are the coolest guy in the world and so they have behavior patterns of a guy who is like that.
If your frame is weak you take on the other person's frame. Reality is whatver you think it is. When I first started hanging with these dudes I used to always get sucked into there frame and so it was hard to interact with them. But after awhile we just had mutual respect and we never threw our frames on each other, only playfully.
Patrick
theobserver said:I also get this, this just happened to me last week as a matter of fact. but now i'm all good =]. i looked it up and it has to do with your frame, that is, your perception on things. what is taught here is to have a "strong" unbreakable frame. certain mindsets lead to certain actions, how you get into this strong framed mindset, well i pretty much convinced myself to, but i read in neil strauss's book, and also in one of the posts here "My natural friends mindset" by Snow Plowman:
strauss' book also says similar things, and gives examples on how to reframe your mindset. but that's what its all about, reframing your mindset. what you think you will become. the way i convinced myself is how much better i feel when i'm in that strong frame, and that's i'd rather live life in this frame than in any other ones, because to me it's empowering. so give yourself reasons to get into that mindset, and it'll happen naturally. hope i helped. good luck man.
Patrick
Ahh, that makes sense. Thank you
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.