"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
trouble relating to people
- Thread starter david90
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
TyTe`EyEs
Master Don Juan
I had one good friend my senior year. Better than zero I guess.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Life-Trainee
Master Don Juan
Spending a lot of time and fun moments with your targets is difinately a must which becomes more difficult as you get older because of time constrants,family, jobs, etc.
In my experience the people who are likeminded to me are more likely to become close friends than those who just share abstract interests and follow a different life path.
But in the beginning stages of friendships it's important to take interest in what your target is doing.
KillingTime
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 21, 2004
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thefonz
Master Don Juan
penkitten
Master Don Juan
choose qaulity over quanity.
Alpine
Master Don Juan
Have you tried joining a few outside school clubs and meet people?
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
CableLight
Master Don Juan
Joking aside, it has been my understanding that the faster the thought about "having to make friends" leaves your mind, the faster you find them.
An amazing characteristic of animals, including humans, is our desire and instinct to find companions. This said, it sounds like you're looking too hard for something you don't know how to find.
What are your interests? Those who share them are, in my opinion, the easiest to befriend.
Play sports? Go to the gym and get in on a game.
Read? Hit a bookstore or, god forbid, the library.
Dance? Go to a dance.
Draw? Get in on a class or something.
Play music? Ask people to jam.
Look for things you have in common with people and know something about. There's a foundation and basis of conversation initiation (ah, poetry).
Going out to meet random people in random situations at random times produces random results. Going to specialized places with almost designated attendants is much more stable.