"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Too Soon To Invite Over To Hang Out???

DharmaBear

Don Juan
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Hey gang,

I just set up a date with a HB 8 I work with (we're going skydiving - not a bad first date!).

Things are going well with us, good flirting, kino, etc. It's moving slowly, and something that's developed over the last year at work (it's not always a good idea to be overDJish at work, so I was easy with the flirting and careful until I felt certain she dug me).

We just set up this date yesterday, and it's for a week and a half from now (that's just how our schedules worked out, vs. when the skydiving place is open).

My question: Would it be AFC of me to call her now and invite her over to hang out and watch a DVD with me tonight or tomorrow night (I know it's something she wants to see), or since we finally cemented this date yesterday is it too soon and/or pushy? Should I just wait 'til this skydiving date?

Help!

-Dharma
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Originally posted by DharmaBear
Hey gang,

I just set up a date with a HB 8 I work with (we're going skydiving - not a bad first date!).

Things are going well with us, good flirting, kino, etc. It's moving slowly, and something that's developed over the last year at work (it's not always a good idea to be overDJish at work, so I was easy with the flirting and careful until I felt certain she dug me).

We just set up this date yesterday, and it's for a week and a half from now (that's just how our schedules worked out, vs. when the skydiving place is open).

My question: Would it be AFC of me to call her now and invite her over to hang out and watch a DVD with me tonight or tomorrow night (I know it's something she wants to see), or since we finally cemented this date yesterday is it too soon and/or pushy? Should I just wait 'til this skydiving date?

Help!

-Dharma
if u can be confident about it, go for it, depending on her IL (wich u said u got a good feel of) u can watch with friends or alone, its not bad with friends if they got their own girls or w/e
 

Ice Cold

Master Don Juan
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Wait till you skydive. It's should be such a fn adrenaline rush, she'd fall in love with ya. :D

Cheers
 

DharmaBear

Don Juan
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See, that's what I was thinking - that the adrenaline, etc. from skydiving will really escalate the emotions, and then BAM! She's putty in my hands. I do plan on that.

But, I'm worried that it's just too long between now and then to wait and see her outside of work. I usually don't set up dates 12 days in advance. Besides, it would be nice just to hang. Thoughts?



-Dharma
 

Ice Cold

Master Don Juan
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Jerk off and find something else to do. Stop thinking about it. Next thing you know, you're gonna have rescue scenarios in your head.

Cheers
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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