"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Told my ex to move on. I keep looking at her insta story...
- Thread starter chris2for
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
She didn’t cheat or anything like that. She’s very loyal. Doesn’t go out partying that much-every once in a while for a friend’s birthday. Got a long with my family. So no “STUFF”.
Yea, I admit I still care about her but that doesn’t mean I care about her in a romantic way.
oldmanofthesea
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In what way do you still care about her, and why?
Would a "friend" agonize over what another "friend" thinks when they view their Instagram stories?
What. Are you transforming into the nonsexual Daddy mode now? Stop the stalking and go complete NC…
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
How is that dad mode? You’ve never fallen out of love with a girl but still cared about her as a person?
Still think you're in denial because you're definitely still in love with her.
vanballmoos
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Right, but it prolongs a mans emotional healing time. Borders on masochism to keep doing it to yourself.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Hold up. Y’all think this behavior is normal (looking at her every post knowing she can see that you’ve looked) ? Especially coming from someone who told their ex to move on? Isn’t this beyond curiosity at this point?
Yep, like I said earlier it borders on masochism, but more probably it’s an obsession.
oldmanofthesea
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And going out of their way to post on an internet forum asking for advice about it?
Yes, it's normal. Perfectly normal. Is it healthy? No. Is he in denial about his feelings for her? Probably. We've all been there. It's ok. No shame. The real question is: Do you listen to the advice you requested or do you keep asking for it while defending yourself repeatedly against the advice?
soulforge
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In the end, she is going to MOVE ON.. and you are going to move on.. So why waste anymore time lingering over her posts, her pics, obsessing about her.
Yes it's a hard thing to do, especially when you have emotionally bonded with a person.
So why not just take on board the advice given, from people who have been in this exact situation and have managed to get over an ex, the quickest and easiest way possible.
If op applied full NC on all platforms, including social media, he could be over this chick in no time, and using his time better spent on things that really matter!
That's the thing though I have moved on. I'd rather be single than with someone who makes me have doubt.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
soulforge
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- Aug 1, 2013
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- 6,239
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- 4,962
I have moved on from my ex too.. Do you know how many times I check her Insta or her social media? NEVER
Got better chit to do!
vanballmoos
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She posts a few times a day. Almost every day. Music, her dog, etc. and I'll look at just about everyone.
That’s obsessive behavior in an attempt to keep your internal emotional connection with her.
vanballmoos
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Not to say I disagree with you, but why not just speak up if that's the case?
No point in asking OP because he'll just deny everything...
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.