"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Thoughts on Co-Workers

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reset said:
Big picture, no rush.

Self-control. Let the other guys jump all over her. HB9 does not equal "special". You're surrounded by HB9s (go with me here). You enjoy a hot chick as much as the next guy but you're past the point of it having any major effect on you, either way. If you see her, that's cool, if not, that's cool too. Hell, for you to really get worked up, she'd have to do a lot of qualifying herself to you. She'd really have to show you that she's worth something, and she'd have to take a personal interest in you. She done that yet?

That is not the mindset of 99% of the guys in your office.

yeah.. well I had a perfect opening to go after work girl. Because I actually worked with her years ago at another company when she was married. Then, when I saw her again at the current workplace, I went up and started talking about how we used to work together and she remembered me.

One of the first things she told me is "she just got divorced". LOL, after that, it was pretty much me saying "what are you doing Friday?"
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Warrior74

Master Don Juan
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If your looking for something long term or a girlfriend and you don't care about your job go for it. If your looking to just get some ass and/or you care about your career, leave it alone. That is where you make your money, its not a game.
 

3countriesPlan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2007
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Beijing/Seoul/Portland
It's never a good idea. Weigh the pros and cons.
Pro: An Hb bedwarmer
Cons: Bad work environment after break up, you getting fired
 

martinM.

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 7, 2007
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France
You know, this site has really opened my eyes to how different dating is in the US, than other countries.

For instance, in a lot of european countries dating someone you work with isn't such a big deal, and some asian countries it's actually encouraged.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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