Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
meh. sex can come later. ain't waiting a year.That sounds like the kind of thing you do with someone you have been with for some time and wanna enjoy a new experience. Definitely would not advise it before sex and before about a year has gone by.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I'd be satisfying myself. She'd just be along for the ride. I'm not switching my life timetable up to try to impress anyone let alone a chick. Especially to try and spice things up. I'd rather keep it moving if it's not working out.Well, the whole point I am trying to make is that you do not have to satisfy her with this kinda thing now, probably the natural attraction is enough to keep you and her ****ing like rabbits and generally having a good time for months. When that starts dying out, you could use things like these to keep it interesting and exciting.
Doesn't matter what the chick thinks. I don't live my life in fear of what they think or according to what they think. I live my life doing what I want to like anyone else.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
As long as this is actually true and it's not just lip service you're fine. You have nothing to prove to anyone, just be honest with yourself.Doesn't matter what the chick thinks. I don't live my life in fear of what they think or according to what they think. I live my life doing what I want to like anyone else.
As long as this is actually true and it's not just lip service you're fine. You have nothing to prove to anyone, just be honest with yourself.
Ask yourself these two questions:
Are you actually just casually going to take a helicopter ride because you want to?
Are you expecting a woman to be more impressed by a helicopter ride than a coffee break, and, therefore more likely to bang you?
Something tells me that your intentions aren't quite as causal as you're claiming - i.e. you wouldn't be posting about it here.
As Grewd said, where do you go from there if you end up dating this bird? First date helicopter; next ten dates coffee? Do you live that type of lifestyle that you causally take helicopter rides?
Extravagance isn't what gets you laid. You can give a woman a fantastic date in a coffee shop, just by being great company.
OK. So why are you asking us about it?if I want to take a helicopter ride around nyc I'll do that and invite who I want to as company.
I couldn't agree more; but the premise of this thread comes across as exactly like plea bargaining.The dudes that actually care as much aa they claim not to and need a "bargaining chip" to get some chick.
Not plea bargaining. Just seeing what others would do. I personally have no interest in living in coffee shops.OK. So why are you asking us about it?
I couldn't agree more; but the premise of this thread comes across as exactly like plea bargaining.
Like I said, be honest with yourself first and stop wasting my time.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Exactly. Same shyt with friends etc who may invite you to some cool place and you go.I am a bit torn on things like this...
There is soooooooo many new things I want to try, and I am a "the more, the merrier" kind of person. I just enjoy having people around. To me, inviting a plate to something that is a bit more girlfriend type of activity is a slippery slope. On one end, you just want to do something fun and are bringing her along for the ride... although I always make them pay their own way. On the flipside, she is going to percieve it as girlfirend type of activity.
In my eyes, she can think whatever the fvck she wants. I am enjoying myself and bringing her along for the ride. For example, I have two free airline tickets and I want to go to Portland this weekend. I may bring my plate along because she will pay for the hotel and rental car, and half the food, while I provde airline tickets that didn't cost me anything.... decision decisions
Agreed! This is certainly something we can see eye to eye on. I love to travel whenever I can, and hanging out iwth someone else that is good company, makes it that much better.Exactly. Same shyt with friends etc who may invite you to some cool place and you go.
only time you'd not take someone is if they show they are a user. if not? take them.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.