Yea, they are masters at seducing the vulnerable. The thing is, they aren't doing these things consciously. When a "romantic" connection with a BPD occurs, it's a toxic mix between hero complex/savior mentality and a VERY damaged individual who sees the hero as someone who can meet their endless emotional needs. This is why these types of relationships/flings are so much harder to move past than the average relationship that unravels and fizzles away.QuadDeuces said:That said, I am quite curious of her techniques though.
I would love to craft the BPD push-pull technique only to use it on making women mentally dependable. Although I think on the inside I am (still) too good hearted for that.
The BPD's entire existence is the continual reliance on others to meet their endless needs and impossible standards. A relationship to them is about sucking the individuality and life force out of the other party. They don't do it on purpose, it's just how they function..there is no self-awareness on their part.
There is only passion in the relationship when she feels she doesn't quite have you in her grasp. The chase is what turns her on and inspires her to fvck like a demon. Once she has you attached, she'll rip you apart until you disappear...then she'll come back and attempt to repeat the process all over again. With her, it's all about constantly reliving abandonment. She draws you in because you're far away, gives you wild passionate sex, then tosses you away until she feels you've drifted too far, then she'll pull you back in again (thank you Bible Belt for coaching me on this).
One other thing about these women, they are the MASTERS of the sh!t test. My BPD ex would pull off more sh!t tests in one night than all other past females I've dated/fvcked did combined.
Check out Sheri Schreiber's articles. I've never seen someone so spot-on about BPD. http://www.gettinbetter.com
She does excellent work.
At the end of the day, you'll never wrap your head around the BPD girl's craziness because normal people don't behave in such paradoxical ways on a consistent basis. She will ALWAYS try to hurt you as you mentioned earlier. She'll call you and say crap like she misses you, then go on to tell you how she had wild sex with some stranger. That's what mind did. She'd tell me how much she missed me and in the same breath tell me about some dude she fvcked in a hot tub over the weekend she "thought was attractive". Absolutely no filter whatsoever.
Figure out what made you fall for this woman and address it fast. There is a gap in your armor somewhere (probably self esteem, equating pain with love, etc that likely started with your mom at an early age) that made you fall for this chick. Do what it takes to become independent of her toxic BS, and move on.
Best of luck man. NO CONTACT.