Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

spax

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Went out last night and met this smoking hot girl at a bar and took her dancing at club. She was eating my face off the whole night and I got home and didn't even think about my ex after that! Will hopefully meet up with her as I got her number some time. All's well :)
 

Noyou

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spax said:
Went out last night and met this smoking hot girl at a bar and took her dancing at club. She was eating my face off the whole night and I got home and didn't even think about my ex after that! Will hopefully meet up with her as I got her number some time. All's well :)
You see? This chick digs what you got going for you. Spin them plates, remember, you're single, you don't answer to anyone but you.
 

GS750

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Nice going Spax. Keep it up bro.
 

spax

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Right this moment, knowing she is town....I am so tempted to text her to meet up. My finger is almost on the 'Send' button. WTF do I do?

What if I miss this opportunity to make things better?! FUUUUARRRK!
 

spax

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Mauser96 said:
24 hours ago, you posted this:


"Went out last night and met this smoking hot girl at a bar and took her dancing at club. She was eating my face off the whole night and I got home and didn't even think about my ex after that! Will hopefully meet up with her as I got her number some time. All's well :) "

What happened to that guy?

Tell you what. Just send her the text and get it over with. Agree to meet her. Don't post about it anymore until you do. Tell us how it turned out.
I'm an emotional roller coaster. Highs and Lows throughout the day. I think my 'Alpha' side will last but then it subsides. It's terrible and as much as I try, I can't help it.

I don't even know what to text her even if I wanted to.
 

spax

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Mauser96 said:
What is your purpose here? You keep asking the same question over and over. You keep getting told to NOT text her, then you argue why you should. Then you are told to go ahead and text her, and you say you wouldn't know what to say.
I would like to meet her and show her that I have changed and improved myself. I'll admit that I was in a bit of a slump when she left me and complacent with my life. I'll also admit that I played a part in the break up by being immature and insecure.

During these past 40 days I've had an opportunity to mature myself as a man, 'grow up a bit', and improve my life. I've lost almost 10lbs, bought myself an apartment, new wardrobe, picked up new hobbies and met new people.

If she see's these changes, I hope she will realise that there is more to me than she thought and we can repair the relationship. After 7 years, we travelled the world, shared so many memories and I saw a future together for us.
 

Genos

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Spax, I would not recommend meeting with her in your current state. As long as you have any expectation or hope for a particular outcome, that desperation will seep out through your words and actions, and it'll end badly.

Unless you have no attachments or ties or hopes for your ex, you're not ready to talk to her. Stay NC. If, after you're able to look at your situation objectively, and you still want her (many move on after recentering themselves and moving on from the break-up), then you can reengage only if you desire to. But right now man, heed our advice - don't dig yourself into a deeper hole. 40 days is not enough to truly heal from a 7 year relationship!
 

Between_The_Lines

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Spax man, we've given you so many pointers and you keep coming back with this "I just want to show her who's the new king of the jungle" drivel that I don't think any more 'advice' is order for your situation. In fact, I now personally think you should meet up with her. Go for it.

Been hitting the gym hard? Make sure to wear a tight shirt to properly show off your physique. Game a girl right in front of her to demonstrate to her that you don't need her ...and that you've got game. What to say to your ex? Well, remember, it's not what you say that matters, but how you say it. Talk to her about sosuave. Talk to her about the red pill, about hypergamy, about push-pull tactics. Tell her you're outcome dependent. Tell her you can't stand betas. When all is said and done, we'll still be here, ready to hear your story. Good luck.
 

JohnyTheArrow

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spax said:
I would like to meet her and show her that I have changed and improved myself.
You don't get it man.Women don't leave men like that.For woman to leave you she must first deteach you in her mind, made a looser out of you.That's why women never give second chance - she imprinted in her mind like in stone "he is ****ing looser who doesn't deserve it".To change it she would have to admit she made mistake - and nobody wants that.It's better for women to live with the fact she made mistake than to admit it.Not only you are a looser in her mind but be sure after break up she run to all her family and friends and told them how much ****ing nobody you are.How is she suppose to fix that ?

And now ... sorry to say ... but you are footholder, you gave all her power, try to change OMFG. Do nothing man.Let the pain and desperation flow from you like water, and when you are empty you will see you don't need her at all.
 

spax

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JohnyTheArrow said:
You don't get it man.Women don't leave men like that.For woman to leave you she must first deteach you in her mind, made a looser out of you.That's why women never give second chance - she imprinted in her mind like in stone "he is ****ing looser who doesn't deserve it".To change it she would have to admit she made mistake - and nobody wants that.It's better for women to live with the fact she made mistake than to admit it.Not only you are a looser in her mind but be sure after break up she run to all her family and friends and told them how much ****ing nobody you are.How is she suppose to fix that ?

And now ... sorry to say ... but you are footholder, you gave all her power, try to change OMFG. Do nothing man.Let the pain and desperation flow from you like water, and when you are empty you will see you don't need her at all.
Sorry for asking so many questions guys. My emotions are like a roller coaster. Up and down throughout the day. I am having an inner struggle between my Alpha side and my AFC side. I held out though and resisted the urge to text her to meet up. I will try go the whole week.
 

Yorkex

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Follow up.

Hey guys , after 1 month of no contact I must admit , I feel slightly better but not great. I learned to cope with the situation better. Talking to 4 girls currently and really close with 1 of them, I explained to her I'm not ready for a relationship so it's strictly hang out and sometimes sex.

The worst times are night time , my ex keeps popping in my head but during the day I'm pretty solid now. She hasn't reached out to apologize or anything but with Christmas and New Year around the corner I think she might. I already planned to ignore if she does.

Lastly, I will like to thank those on here who give concrete advice. I am by no means God's gift to women but since middle school through to university I have never had a problem getting women. Still young but I know that in life you meet people that will leave a mark on you forever , so you guys need to be aware when giving people advice. Not every situation calls for brute and harsh actions. A true alpha male doesn't need to insult or degrade a person to feel in charge & just because a person is asking for advise does not mean they are weak.
 

spax

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Today would have been our 7 year anniversary. About 45 days NC so far. I don't intend to contact her and she has not contacted me.

As an added bonus, a friend of mine uploaded a photo of me on Facebook being kissed on both cheeks by two hot girls. She would've seen it and I hope it tore her up a bit.
 

Noyou

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spax said:
Today would have been our 7 year anniversary. About 45 days NC so far. I don't intend to contact her and she has not contacted me.

As an added bonus, a friend of mine uploaded a photo of me on Facebook being kissed on both cheeks by two hot girls. She would've seen it and I hope it tore her up a bit.
You need to get to the point where you don't give a damn she thinks. You are so worried about getting revenge and/or inflating your ego that you are damaging who you are as a man, as an "alpha" and as an individual. You need way more time to heal from a 7 year relationship. Do not go and meet her. You will get destroyed, and you will come back here saying how bad you feel, and start the healing all over again.

It's fine if your friends are posting pics with you with other women, but don't go about it trying to get revenge. That seems petty and needy on your end and you are better than that.
 

mikey2012

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spax said:
Today would have been our 7 year anniversary. About 45 days NC so far. I don't intend to contact her and she has not contacted me.

As an added bonus, a friend of mine uploaded a photo of me on Facebook being kissed on both cheeks by two hot girls. She would've seen it and I hope it tore her up a bit.
She ain't coming back. You need to rid yourself of these demons. However I think it's going take you a few years to get over this or you may never. That's what seperates the weak from the strong. The strong move forward the weak just wallow and die....
 

spax

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mikey2012 said:
She ain't coming back. You need to rid yourself of these demons. However I think it's going take you a few years to get over this or you may never. That's what seperates the weak from the strong. The strong move forward the weak just wallow and die....
Na. I have been better the last couple of days. 45 days NC, have resisted from meeting her, and am meeting up with new girls. Give it a couple months and I'll be over her :box:
 

mikey2012

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spax said:
Na. I have been better the last couple of days. 45 days NC, have resisted from meeting her, and am meeting up with new girls. Give it a couple months and I'll be over her :box:
Lol this is only the beginning... You will have up and down days.....you be posting here when you have your down ones.
 

Genos

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mikey2012 said:
Lol this is only the beginning... You will have up and down days.....you be posting here when you have your down ones.
And that's absolutely fine, I encourage him to do so. The point of this thread is for us to help each other move on - whatever happens, whatever you're feeling, you'll have someone to talk to. Don't be afraid of posting here when you're feeling down.
 

Noyou

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spax said:
Na. I have been better the last couple of days. 45 days NC, have resisted from meeting her, and am meeting up with new girls. Give it a couple months and I'll be over her :box:
Maybe, maybe not. One cannot tell the future. Meeting other women is a very good idea because you were caught up with one woman for 7 years. There are other women that you should invest your time into, as the woman you were with doesn't want anything to do with you.

Do you really want to be with a woman or care for a woman when she will be fickle and leave you? She showed you what she's made of and she utterly failed to meet your standards.

And forget about revenge, the best revenge is moving on and living well and even at that point you won't even care.
 

spax

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Fuuuuucking hell boys. I hang my head in shame. I broke the NC rule after about 47 days.

Woke up today with the feels HARD and texted some soppy message like "Hey, I'm sure you're in town now. Hope you're having a relaxing and enjoyable time. :)"

No response.

Kill me fuuuuucking now. I am beyond beta. Fuuuck!
 

Dgwizdal

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spax said:
Fuuuuucking hell boys. I hang my head in shame. I broke the NC rule after about 47 days.

Woke up today with the feels HARD and texted some soppy message like "Hey, I'm sure you're in town now. Hope you're having a relaxing and enjoyable time. :)"

No response.

Kill me fuuuuucking now. I am beyond beta. Fuuuck!
Neg. Youre a fvckin moron. Go to loveshack for advice cause you haven't listened to anything here. Now you've completely reset your clock and your dignity. Beta newb.
 
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