Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
.can you and others please elaborate?DonJoseCantosie said:> : - ). I love lunch time pickups! If u want to keep it simple...go up to her, invite urself to sit down. She can accept or reject(most women won't reject, 99% will accept). For conversation, prolly something light hearted about the food/what she's doing around here, etc...and then deeper stuff
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Absolutely. Aright, first you go up to her while she's sitting down. U ask her or the group, "Room for one more?" or "Mind if i sit here?" or "I'm sitting down with you...are you down with that?" with a smile of course. They will 9/10 accept. When u sit down, u introduce urself and get their names. From here, go into light topics such as what foods they like, what they like to do in the meantime, something light. But make sure u look at her in the eyes with a smile so she knows that u like her(make sure she knows otherwise she'll most likely just think ur just being friendly). After this, if she's receptive to the light stuff....go into deeper stuff, find out about her. Ask her open ended questions about herself, and thus with some of the things she says let her talk..and then contribute some portion to where u can relate to it. For example: If she says she likes Aerobics, even if u haven't done aerobics...u can go into things similar or ask if its similar to how it looks on TV. Then after ur done eating, get her contact information. Trust me, most won't reject a person eating with them. The hard part is letting them know u indeed do like them. Hope that helpsonthepath said:
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