Be specific, anything you want to know or any questions.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
the appeal of narcisists and sociopats
- Thread starter tesla8520
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
FlexpertHamilton
Master Don Juan
Women aren't directly attracted to narcissists and sociopaths they're attracted to qualities that those men tend to possess ie rock-solid frames.
I agree with you.
And I also think these rock-solid frames don't come from a place of security, but insecurity.
For us men, all that matters is understanding where that security comes from.
But I don't think women can tell the difference.
FlexpertHamilton
Master Don Juan
That's the most frustrating part. Women don't really understand men on a fundamental level, due to their solipcism and projection. They only react to the behaviors and then make up post-hoc explainations in order to convince themselves they've "figured him out".
While it is true that woman can sniff out insecurity/neediness etc, I think they are equally likely to get blindsided by a man who completely controls the frame. I'm convinced now that frame control (and it's primary downstream effect, compliance) is the single important factor for maintaining attraction and respect.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
This is interesting! Do you have examples?
It is! But there's something to add. When a woman cheats on the man who has had the most emotional power in her life, and then, they eventually keep the couple, she may still be controlled by his frame, but in my opinion there's no longer any admiration. There may be respect for the situation, but not admiration or desire.
also, from personal experience, if you're a man that can control the frame with a specific woman, this doesn't mean that will work with another one too. Curious about your experience on this
BaronOfHair
Master Don Juan
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Given the state most of us are in today, a fellow like this
Seems like top-of-the-line mating
Seems like top-of-the-line mating