"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
The #1 Way 2 Tell IL
- Thread starter AFCinBC
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
RedKnight04
Senior Don Juan
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ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZevolvingnerd
Senior Don Juan
where's eternal?
KnightRyder
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Whatever happened to EC, body language, tonality ...etc
hehe
how do you justify this ?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Don Juanabbe
Master Don Juan
Then I ask them for their number and they balk....
KnightRyder
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SO Don Juanabbe, so are saying this Thread is right on the money ???
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
whats with you guys shut the **** up about the "symantics of seduction" who the **** cares if you ask 1000 girls out with NO repore at least SOME of them will say yes better than wasting
wait I want this one to sink in...
WASTING your ****ING time THINKING... about what the meaning behind her touching her lip when you walked past her... omg eather grow some balls and ask or cut them off and save us the trouble.
And...
maybe instead of wasting ur time thinking about girls... you might want to.. I duno think about.. your financial stability... your carrier ... how your gona make your first million ... think about it ... have you seen bill gates wife?
Women as well as men don't give out their numbers to total strangers who ask for their number. Would you give out your number to a total stranger? I know I wouldn't. It has nothing to do with seduction it's common sense. It's about trust.
I'll rather approach 10 girls and have a fun convo and see if it leads to something. Then I might ask her out or take her on a instadate. You seem so horny to ask her out which will only get you shot down. Relax, take a step back. Don't be so needy.
If a stranger would never give out their number to another stranger... how do you get dates? your relatives? I bet they trust you.
this is what I was talking about... your analyzing what I say down to the littlest detail so you can prove me wrong and somehow be eccumentically superior in the eyes of the "Forum"
why dont you let good advice stand.
If you cant judge IL
ask her out
its that simple.... are you to afraid of rejection to ask a girl out cause she might say no? um. ?
By "wasting time" thinking and judging interest signals, you save your dignity and the time and effort of approaching 1000 women, most of who are sure to shoot you down.
I agree that some people go into too much detail judging signs, but just holding back for returned eye contact or some open gestures will save you a lot of bother.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
I understand how you think. If you go for it, maybe she will say yes! And you have a date! It's a good place to start just to get your number of approaches and dates up.
Now I have been in that "Phase" of DJing and I have had my fair hundreds of rejections. It's not that I am afraid I don't agree with you, it is because I have other goals of interaction with women than you.
For example. The girl who you do not know if she shows interest or not. You might ask her out because you might GET a date with her. I wouldn't. Because I do not want people who do not show me interest in my life. Getting a date is not a sign of being successful, my idea of successful is to be surrounded by people who show interest in me.
Looking from this perspective I gain nothing from having a date with someone who play games or show me moderate interest and make my wallet thinner. No I gain more of not asking her because it means I am one step closer to meeting a great girl who DO show interest signals.
You want people to ask every women who you are attracted to for a date. I want to ask for a date on every women who are attracted to me and show me interest.
What you think, so shall you become.
Chemistry
Master Don Juan
But if your sat at home thinkin bout that girl who you're sure likes you, because she did X and Y today, so you're in, then this is the only way rather than lying to yourself...
That said, as far as success is concerned, rapport is very important, the only way to manoeuvre round it is if you look that thoro
skinnydart
Master Don Juan
crotchrocket
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Repeated eye contact, playing with her hair, phoning you, flirting with... are all MAJOR interest signals, great if they're so obvious others around you can see them (and if they are what are you questioning it for?) but they aren't necessary, in their less obvious form, they are mearly 'triggers' for your gut instinct, intuition...
One Rule: If you THINK she is interested, then SHE IS INTERESTED!!
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.