Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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texts before a date

pyros

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So, do you guys try to get to know a girl, just a bit, before you ask her out?
or do you , for example, get her number one night, talk to her for 3 minutes (you get her name, age, and some random information about her), then some day you text her mainly to ask her out on a date?

I say this because a few times I've been on a date with a girl I barely knew (just her name and what she studied) and I realised I didn't like her once I had spoken to her for , lets say, 20 minutes, so it was disapointing and a waste of time. So maybe it is better to chat a bit, exchange a few texts, and see if you click at least via text? or to see if you have things in common before going on a date?

Thoughts?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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dustmuffin

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You won't know if you like her until you meet. Plus if she likes you you can f uck even if you don't like her. I would anyway.
 

Building_and_Loan

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Just curious, how is this situation arising? Through online dating?

Anytime you get a girl's number, you should at least be talking to her long enough to get her interested to the point where asking for her number is pretty much just a formality, and you don't need to be worried about developing rapport over text before you ask her out.

If it's online dating though, I have no idea, as I've never done it. You're not going to get to know anyone over text anyway.
 

Maximus Rex

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I get to know her on the walk to and at the venue during the instadate that we're on.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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EyeBRollin

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Solid advice if she answers, but what if you get voicemail. What's your follow up?
I usually wait a week and try again. If she doesn't answer again, I may text in another 48 hours and ask for the date via text. If she doesn't answer the phone or get back to you in 9 days, she isn't interested enough to ever go out with you
 

Yewki

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I usually wait a week and try again. If she doesn't answer again, I may text in another 48 hours and ask for the date via text. If she doesn't answer the phone or get back to you in 9 days, she isn't interested enough to ever go out with you
The only problem I have with this is some people don't answer the phone if it's an unrecognized number. You might not be saved as a contact. I personally get a call or two a day from unrecognized numbers and rarely do I answer them because I know it's usually BS. If it's important they'll leave a voicemail.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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EyeBRollin

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The only problem I have with this is some people don't answer the phone if it's an unrecognized number. You might not be saved as a contact. I personally get a call or two a day from unrecognized numbers and rarely do I answer them because I know it's usually BS. If it's important they'll leave a voicemail.
Wait 48 hours and ask em via text. I really just rinse and repeat. If she doesn't save you as a contact, you're already pretty low on her priority list.
 

Yewki

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If she doesn't save you as a contact, you're already pretty low on her priority list.
I don't know that's definitely debatable. She couldn't anyways if you just got her number and haven't texted
 
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