Text rapport VS asking out

Visionist

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A little advice here would be sweet. My kid sister's BF has for ages talked about this "nice girl" he knows of who "doesn't get out much" in his words. He kept suggesting I meet her, even saying she "wants to know me", so eventually I thought "why not" and contacted her on FB. She didn't reply and so I assumed it was all BS.

After ten days or so she replies and we text a bit. Some c*cky funny from me, establishing my frame and interests and a little probing of her frankly seemingly dull persona, and I say "Ok let's stop texting, I'll meet you soon, instead". I wait a week and, not having met or knowing really anything about her, drop her another text playfully exploring her lack of travel and telling her I'll be in her town next week and we should meet up. She replies "poi vedremo" which translates to "eventually we'll see".

Since I don't know her, it isn't easy engaging her libido via cold texting. She seems fairly uninteresting overall, admitting to having no hobbies and very little formal education. I just need to smash a warm pu$$y already, so who cares about any of that. But it isn't making engaging with her easy. The logical thing would be to maybe text game her lightly over a month or so, and then see if she'll meet me, with anything but a hard "Yes!" being my cue to next her.

Her birthday is next week, I was planning to not say Happy Birthday though and ignore her for at least 10 days or so.
 

GrowingPains

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Stop playing games and tell her you are going 'here' at 'this' time and that she should come. 'Hey I'll be at X (some local bar) next Friday at 8. You should come and have a drink'. If she comes, she comes. If she doesn't, she doesn't. Go somewhere you will enjoy and where I'd she doesn't, you can find that warm pu$$y you're looking for anyways.

Text game.. don't text. Only to get logistics squared away.
 

nicksaiz65

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Stop playing games and tell her you are going 'here' at 'this' time and that she should come. 'Hey I'll be at X (some local bar) next Friday at 8. You should come and have a drink'. If she comes, she comes. If she doesn't, she doesn't. Go somewhere you will enjoy and where I'd she doesn't, you can find that warm pu$$y you're looking for anyways.

Text game.. don't text. Only to get logistics squared away.
I 100% endorse this. Texting for logistics is the way to go. It works so dang well
 

GrowingPains

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I 100% endorse this. Texting for logistics is the way to go. It works so dang well
The only time I would advocate for texting is when you feel there's a good connection between the two of you and it feels 'easy'. She will make it easy for you, and you'll know she is because it'll seem like she WANTS to talk. But even then, keep it limited and light.
 

nicksaiz65

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The only time I would advocate for texting is when you feel there's a good connection between the two of you and it feels 'easy'. She will make it easy for you, and you'll know she is because it'll seem like she WANTS to talk. But even then, keep it limited and light.
Sounds like you know the Game
 

Visionist

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Annoyingly I've consistently been either flaked upon or ignored outright when I cut to the chase quickly via comms. Maybe it's an Italian thing. At the same time I don't enjoy texting (and hate talking on the phone) and so don't enjoy wasting very much time before inviting a girl to meet me.

At this stage this girl won't accept an invitation, but at the same time I don't care to keep texting her, either.

This is why any sort of OLD has never been for me. Meeting face to face is vital.
 

Visionist

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lmao I did. She said no. That's the whole point.
 

Visionist

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She said "we'll see" which to me means "no, for now".

Just saying that the established wisdom of asking a girl you haven't met out as quickly as possible and skipping the building of rapport online or via text, is a big fat scam. It doesn't work. They won't go out with me if they don't know me.
 

nicksaiz65

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She said "we'll see" which to me means "no, for now".

Just saying that the established wisdom of asking a girl you haven't met out as quickly as possible and skipping the building of rapport online or via text, is a big fat scam. It doesn't work. They won't go out with me if they don't know me.
I just thought of this video when you said this

 

EyeBRollin

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She said "we'll see" which to me means "no, for now".

Just saying that the established wisdom of asking a girl you haven't met out as quickly as possible and skipping the building of rapport online or via text, is a big fat scam. It doesn't work. They won't go out with me if they don't know me.
There is nothing you or anyone else can say to persuade an uninterested woman out on a date. That’s what you’re having trouble accepting. This girl was never interested in you. Any mental energy expended on why is a waste of time. That’s the bigger point said “wisdom” addresses.
 

Dan.Lifestyle

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A little advice here would be sweet. My kid sister's BF has for ages talked about this "nice girl" he knows of who "doesn't get out much" in his words. He kept suggesting I meet her, even saying she "wants to know me", so eventually I thought "why not" and contacted her on FB. She didn't reply and so I assumed it was all BS.

After ten days or so she replies and we text a bit. Some c*cky funny from me, establishing my frame and interests and a little probing of her frankly seemingly dull persona, and I say "Ok let's stop texting, I'll meet you soon, instead". I wait a week and, not having met or knowing really anything about her, drop her another text playfully exploring her lack of travel and telling her I'll be in her town next week and we should meet up. She replies "poi vedremo" which translates to "eventually we'll see".

Since I don't know her, it isn't easy engaging her libido via cold texting. She seems fairly uninteresting overall, admitting to having no hobbies and very little formal education. I just need to smash a warm pu$$y already, so who cares about any of that. But it isn't making engaging with her easy. The logical thing would be to maybe text game her lightly over a month or so, and then see if she'll meet me, with anything but a hard "Yes!" being my cue to next her.

Her birthday is next week, I was planning to not say Happy Birthday though and ignore her for at least 10 days or so.
Yeah no worries bro you're overthinking it. The clue is "She doesn't get out much". So she's probably just shy. Idk what you're looking for but girls like that need a bit of time to meet with a guy from online and get pretty attached by the time they actually do. Are you sure that's what you want? Because there are definitely faster choices out there.
 

Amante Silvestre

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Tell this friend of yours who is trying to set you up that you left the ball in her court. Move on to greener pastures and let him do the leg work if he chooses (don’t ask him to) of convincing her to meet up with you.

She is more likely going to be coerced by someone she knows better than by your chit chat texts over weeks and months.

Do your own thing in the meantime with zero expectations of this happening.

Texting can have benefits, but in this case you’re just trying to pull teeth.
 

Howiestern

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She said "we'll see" which to me means "no, for now".

Just saying that the established wisdom of asking a girl you haven't met out as quickly as possible and skipping the building of rapport online or via text, is a big fat scam. It doesn't work. They won't go out with me if they don't know me.
Anything from a woman other than a yes......means NO. She isn't interested.

Women with high interest are very easy to figure out and are never difficult to deal with.
 

AttackFormation

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Annoyingly I've consistently been either flaked upon or ignored outright when I cut to the chase quickly via comms. Maybe it's an Italian thing. At the same time I don't enjoy texting (and hate talking on the phone) and so don't enjoy wasting very much time before inviting a girl to meet me.

At this stage this girl won't accept an invitation, but at the same time I don't care to keep texting her, either.

This is why any sort of OLD has never been for me. Meeting face to face is vital.
It isnt cutting to the chase that makes them ghost or flake. They never intended to meet or have sex with you. Thats why you cut to the chase, to weed them out. Your idea that valuing your own time turns them off is delusional. Women want men who respect themselves, and they know what theyre doing. She either intends to fvck you in the first few seconds after seeing you or your pictures, or not.

You wanna talk big fat scams? Spending your energy to give a woman validation and entertainment for free, then thinking the problem was you not being enough of an ingratiating circus monkey for her. Youre kidding me dude.

PS. @Who Dares Win has called italy part of europes "dead zone" for dating along with i think it was spain, Portugal and greece. Maybe a vacation, say to asia, would do you good.
 
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Espi

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Straight talk if you can handle it:

In my opinion your post reveals that you're 90% blue pill. Lots of mistakes stemming from the blue-pill mentality, and blue-pill thinking stems from a lack of experience, which stems from a fear of failure and/or social conformity.

But that's actually what you're supposed to be doing: making lots of mistakes....which involve lots of experience and lots of failures and ultimately red-pill mindset. BUT in my opinion you also have to be willing to keep an open mind and learn from those mistakes.

I excerpted phrases from your post and you can decide if they're indeed mistakes that you can learn from and thereby elevate your mindset from blue to red. To do that requires MORE flakings, MORE rejections, MORE bitterness toward women...and most importantly, you need more RESILENCE. No matter how many times you get flaked on or rejected you keep moving forward, fully confident that you're improving every day.

contacted her on FB.

After ten days or so she replies

"I'll meet you soon, instead". I wait a week

"eventually we'll see".

engaging her libido via cold texting.

I just need to smash a warm pu$$y already, so who cares about any of that.

The logical thing would be to maybe text game her lightly over a month or so, and then see if she'll meet me

I was planning to not say Happy Birthday though and ignore her for at least 10 days or so.
 
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Espi

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She said "we'll see" which to me means "no, for now".

Just saying that the established wisdom of asking a girl you haven't met out as quickly as possible and skipping the building of rapport online or via text, is a big fat scam. It doesn't work. They won't go out with me if they don't know me.
All of this is untrue, in my opinion.

In my opinion the one thing you definitely have going for you is your no-bullshiat, quick-direct approach. I like it. I'm the same way (I've laid over 50 women).

NOTE that your direct-approach style will repel most women but that's OK. Stick to it and keep inviting them out and eventually you'll snag a hot chick or two. But regardless of how you approach there is no easy way and there is no fail-safe way. You MUST be willing to sift through a lot of dirt to get to those few ounces of gold.
 
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backseatjuan

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Obviously @Visionist you're blue pill and lacking some experience. Tell me please, why would your friend try to set you up with a girl, eh? Obviously, because you're single and thirsty, or in other words unsuccessful with women. Your attitude in your original post reflects it. Either we see each other, or no. As if you have other options. Perhaps you do, but not a lot of them.

With this girl, everything is lost, she said we'll see. That means a no. Natural thing of chasing her ass will not do anything. And there is no such thing as in italian culture (or whatever culture) you have to chase them, or she is old fashioned, or whatever. No! World doesn't work like that. Everything in this world is constant with DJ game no matter the culture.

I can bet my two cents that your texting with her was 100% platonic, there was no flirting. There is also good chance that she didn't even sht test you, or if she did you failed, or didn't even see it. So asking her out from platonic phase?? What kind of result did you expect here?

I can't text, that is an excuse you made up for yourself.
I can't talk on the phone, that is also an excuse you made up for yourself.

As if when time comes to meet with her in person, you will be that prince. No it won't be like that. When the time comes, you will be saying I can't meet with girls, I prefer just go straight to sex part and be done with it. Then there is no point in women whatsoever, god gave you right hand, use it.

Texting can be learned by watching youtube and practicing. Talking on the phone also can be learned, again youtube and practicing. When you saying I can't text or talk on the phone, all that means you do not have experience and afraid to try it, your mind just shutting you down. You even coming up with excuse, it's either she meet me or fck it.

But why would she meet you? You are not interesting.

No, texting her more, warming her up, or whatever you call it, will not work. Kissing ass never works. In fact she already has an idea of who you are, you can't change that frame. You see, each text conversation (online dating for example) has four parts to it. Silence, Sht test, platonic, flirting. You treat each part differently, you approach each part differently. You do not ask her out when she is giving you silence, you do not ask her out when she sht testing you, or when you two are having a platonic conversation - sht, what you do for a living, I work at a bar, do you want to go out? We'll see. :rolleyes: That kind of sht has a place to be, if you're an underwear model with build body, and are a 9 to chicks, so that they jump on you, it sometimes will work. But you're not, stop acting like you are.

You treat silence with fun witty one liners that are about you and her, and you don't ask questions, something she don't have to reply to.
You treat sht tests like her investing into you her time, good thing, you just pass the sht test, and don't follow up, ask questions, you let her come back at you.
Platonic conversations are good, and you write something short and flirt to get out of it.
Flirting is when you start making plans, that's when you get her number and give her a call and flirt some more on the phone.
From this phase you make a qualifier question, vague suggestion, find out her schedule, and make plans. Are you an adventurous person? What’s your view on drinks and witty banter? When are you free this week? Let meet this day this time!

You had a conversation which was going nowhere from the start because you had no plan. Start planning your moves.
 
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