"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

telling a girl how u feel...

illmatic1005

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 23, 2005
Messages
211
Reaction score
1
every girl im with always tells me i never tell them how i feel...

i do it thru actions tho...

should i tell them how i feel or what??
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Sun Tzu

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 19, 2006
Messages
169
Reaction score
3
Your question is much too general. Give us an example. Do you mean "how you feel about her, your relationship, etc.", or just everything in general?

Elaborate and we will grace you with our wisdom.
 

Incog

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2006
Messages
232
Reaction score
10
illmatic1005 said:
every girl im with always tells me i never tell them how i feel...

i do it thru actions tho...

should i tell them how i feel or what??
Never.
 

Micheal Moon

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 3, 2007
Messages
87
Reaction score
2
I don't recommend it all.

Show her you like her through action (kino etc). She'll get the picture.

I had a good little thing a while back w/ girl and heard she liked me. I told her the same thing and it went all downhill from there.

I should have just trusted my instincts and let things develop. Funny thing is I know better, I guess it was just a rookie mistake.

I was a fool for doing that.
 

betterthandead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2007
Messages
296
Reaction score
7
Depends on her personality and your personality. If she's the type that likes someone who likes to gush out feelings she will probably be the type that doesn't mind people gushing out feeling.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

TheHumanist

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2007
Messages
380
Reaction score
13
Incog said:
Wait. Wait. Let's not go to general ourselves. I'm not the best or qualified person to give advice, but someone have to say it.

There is a "it depends on what you mean" thing going. Yes, actions is the perfer way to express how you feel, and it is recommended to stick with it.

However, it does not mean all feelings should be hidden and you can never say anything about how you feel about her. The danger is the AFC action of saying "I love you" repeatedly like some sick puppy dog starved for love with no ounce of self-respect for yourself or any dignity.

To quote from someone I can't remember who deliberate on this subject, he say its ok to tell her how you feel and then he goes and say since some people are too afraid, he suggest to start with things like "I care about you."

Is that so dangerous? Would a line like that will kill all her interest and make her run straight to the next guy she she sees?

The point is, if you mean sitting her down and spew a confesion of undying love larger than what came out during the eruption of Mount Saint Helens? Hells no.

If you mean if it ok to express concern or write a note after not seeing her for a while like "I miss you" or tell her, when appropriate, a word of what you think of her? That's ok, but then kiss her.
 

tjf420

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2007
Messages
12
Reaction score
0
betterthandead said:
Depends on her personality and your personality. If she's the type that likes someone who likes to gush out feelings she will probably be the type that doesn't mind people gushing out feeling.

hahaha.. that is great
 

Randallpink83

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 17, 2006
Messages
587
Reaction score
4
Location
In the club/bars
in the beginning... absolutely not... But if you already have had sex, then why not? She needs rapport and connection.. especially if shes YOUR girl.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Consider telling these women how you appreciate them. You don't need to profess an undying love for them but every once in a while on a spur of the moment basis tell them something simple like "You know, I like having you around." You'd be surprised at how that can keep the relationship viable and your ego preserved. :up:
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

I.A.F.Y.B.

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2007
Messages
2,051
Reaction score
21
Location
USA
Francisco d'Anconia said:
Consider telling these women how you appreciate them. You don't need to profess an undying love for them but every once in a while on a spur of the moment basis tell them something simple like "You know, I like having you around." You'd be surprised at how that can keep the relationship viable and your ego preserved. :up:
Yup, Its ok to tell a woman a LITTLE how you feel bout them.
 

hell695

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 2, 2007
Messages
107
Reaction score
0
Location
the bay
i think it's o.k to tell her u love in a long term relationship just not in the first while and not to much
 
Last edited:
Top