"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Tell me what I'm doing wrong?

R2Change

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
11
Reaction score
0
5 years dating great, past 2 married - no so great....

Issues we fight over..

1. I'm trying to tell her a story or a fact & she tells me I'm wrong or that's not the way it goes?
My reaction: I blow up

2. I tell her personal family stuff as she tells me personal family stuff?
I listen, empathize and move on...She takes stuff personally and thinks that's a bad cousin or bad uncle, I'm never going to talk to them...I'm like What? This is just fun married couple stuff to talk about? After she says stuff like that...
My reaction : I blow up

3. She initiates certain ideas such as let's go buy plane tickets and see your family? I'm telling her, are sure we have enough money, yeah more than enough...so we set it up, I tell my parents and a month before the trip, she's angry and crying saying we don't have enough money...I bring up the fact that i brought the money issue before...but she saying we had enough but i didn't expect it to cost this much...
My reaction : I blow up

Tell me what I'm doing wrong? So, I can correct it...
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

FastMen

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 20, 2009
Messages
60
Reaction score
0
I think you should not try to solve the problems, just listen to her...ive been there .
About the money issue is a tought spot, no simple bullsht , So you might as well save some... or tell the truth
 

Amazing

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 2, 2005
Messages
645
Reaction score
17
Age
44
Location
ATL
Not really sure because even I can't understand what you are talking about.
 

R2Change

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
11
Reaction score
0
Where do you need clarafication?

I probably wasn't real clear...I wrote it quickly...What part don't you understand?
 

Amazing

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 2, 2005
Messages
645
Reaction score
17
Age
44
Location
ATL
"""1. I'm trying to tell her a story or a fact & she tells me I'm wrong or that's not the way it goes?
"""

you forgot to write you say this to other people.. i read it as you telling her a story and she correct you, which made no sense.

control your woman. tell her what you need her to do (STFU when you tell a story) if she can't do this then why did you even pick her
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

R2Change

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
11
Reaction score
0
@ Fastman

I think you're right...I do need to work not solving the problem & just listening...I use to be good at that when we we're dating, now w/ each argument I get less and less patient....but absolutely...I need to get back to not solving problems and understanding her point of view even if it is at odds w/ me...
 

Amazing

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 2, 2005
Messages
645
Reaction score
17
Age
44
Location
ATL
Yeah that one is big, they just want to vent, they rarely want you to tell them waht to do - my buddy will tell his gf "DONT TALK TO THAT CHICK SHE SUCKS" and then next time she complains again about her he goes ??????????? i told you what to do and you ignored it and then she gets mad at HIM

just listen and "Uh huh, go on, I told you that ***** crazy" is all you need.

Which is stupid because if they listened may be they would make things better
 

Trader

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
991
Reaction score
72
R2Change said:
5 years dating great, past 2 married - no so great....

Issues we fight over..

1. I'm trying to tell her a story or a fact & she tells me I'm wrong or that's not the way it goes?
My reaction: I blow up

2. I tell her personal family stuff as she tells me personal family stuff?
I listen, empathize and move on...She takes stuff personally and thinks that's a bad cousin or bad uncle, I'm never going to talk to them...I'm like What? This is just fun married couple stuff to talk about? After she says stuff like that...
My reaction : I blow up

3. She initiates certain ideas such as let's go buy plane tickets and see your family? I'm telling her, are sure we have enough money, yeah more than enough...so we set it up, I tell my parents and a month before the trip, she's angry and crying saying we don't have enough money...I bring up the fact that i brought the money issue before...but she saying we had enough but i didn't expect it to cost this much...
My reaction : I blow up

Tell me what I'm doing wrong? So, I can correct it...
You have a short fuse.
 

hexx

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 1, 2010
Messages
32
Reaction score
1
Location
Boston/Amherst,MA
Damn dude, are you sure you're not some kind of bomb? Lighten up a bit!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Top