"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Taking her to a hotel? Would like to hear opinions from the ladies.

Alle_Gory

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So I'm seeing a new girl now. Actually she used to be a friend of mine. So much for friendzones. We need to get around to fvcking while she's still running hot... and I've got other girls I'm chasing too. So I need to make this easy.

Only problem is that I still live with my folks (student), and so does she and they're ALWAYS home. Is the hotel a decent idea? What other options do I have? Outside is not an option since I'm in Canada, and there's no way in hell she's messing up my car.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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WaterTiger

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Hotels are fine, but will get expensive. (Also, meeting at cheap hotels for a hook-up is SO 1970)

Do you have a sympathetic friend? (Give him money for a movie, and you get his house for 2 hours?)
 

Cinamon

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The best thing about a hotel is that you have all that space to try out a number of positions and scenarios. Is it possible in the workplace or maybe even in one of the lecture theatres after class?

I guess part of it comes down to how the both of you would feel doing it in public places, like parks etc. I did it in my early twenties and it werent a big deal, dont know if i would do that again now though. Sometimes the thrill of getting caught is fun. How much of a prude is this girl?
 

shaunuk

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If she's adventurous and you don't want to do it outside...what I'd do is take her to the basement of my uni department's building, or the toilets in that building...not all that risky.

In fact, I wouldn't be worrying about this at all because I'd just do it in my car...I'd rather get a fvck and worry about any mess later (how much mess will there really be btw? Not much in my experience...and if you really care, put down a towel or blanket)
 

Cinamon

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I'm going to be working late again today, so have invtied a friend round for a coffee later, but i'm guessing he is going to be getting a bit more than a coffee if i have something to do with it ;)

I think Shaun is right, balnket/towels are good. There was this one guy i did who would carry a duver in the back of his van for these kind of encounters under the excuse he used it to wrap his musical equipment in.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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